April Madness
by Gaby Black
Summary: JPLE, SBOC. Insanity takes over Hogwarts. Expectedly, the Marauders take credit for most of it, but, more surprisingly, Lily and her friends join in the fun too. Includes a drunken Sirius, pranks, kisses & general delirium. Now everyone to St Mungo's!
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, JK Rowling does.

**Pairings:** James/Lily, Sirius/OC

**Summary:** Insanity takes over Hogwarts for the whole month of April. Expectedly, the Marauders take credit for most of it, but, more surprisingly, Lily and her friends join in the fun too, to James's and Sirius's great pleasure. Includes a drunken Sirius, pranks kisses and general delirium. Now everyone to St Mungo's!

**Author's Note: **This is written for **Cuban Sombrero Gal**'s challenge. I know this prologue is ridiculously short, I just wanted you to be intrigued! First chapter coming very soon.

* * *

**Prologue**

"You got it, then?"

The girl looked up at him; cold blue eyes met sparkling hazel.

"I am not stupid," the girl stated stiffly.

"I know!" James said quickly. "I was just making sure…"

James looked away, finding the girl's piercing gaze unnerving.

"It's not as if it was a master plan of an incredible complexity," the girl rolled her eyes. "All I have to do is make –"

"Don't!" James interrupted her, looking around warily. "You mustn't say it, in case somebody hears us."

The blonde girl chuckled as she realized James was serious.

"You're desperate," she said.

James turned to her and had to make an effort to smile charmingly.

"But, then, I don't mind that," the girl admitted.

James smiled again as she left, but this time his smile was undoubtedly tainted with mischief. _Lily Evans will have a special day tomorrow_, he said to himself.


	2. Chapter 1: A Special April Fools' Day

**Author's Note:** thanks for reviewing/adding this to your alerts! Hope you like it, and please leave a review! Don't know when I'll update next as I unexpectedly and finally landed a job for 3 weeks (thankfully it's only part-time, 4h30 a day), and then, college starts again... so I'll try finishing this story before I get caught up with this hectic life, most likely before the end of October.

* * *

**Chapter 1: A Special April Fools' Day**

"Oh, _no_."

Lily Evans almost missed the last step of the staircase leading to the Entrance Hall, which she was presently descending. Looking shocked, she covered her mouth with her hand; it took her a few seconds to be able to think rationally. She quickly made her way into the Great Hall, her face now expressionless. Little did she know that Remus Lupin had not missed anything of it.

"She's gone," Remus said.

Remus turned to James Potter and Danae McKinnon, who stopped kissing immediately. For this had been the reason for Lily's strange behaviour: she had seen James and Danae snogging.

"Did it work?" James asked excitedly.

"Certainly," Remus smiled.

"I wish I could have seen her face," James regretted. "But I was supposed to be kissing you."

"Yeah, thanks," Danae rolled her eyes, playing with her long blonde hair nervously.

"We're supposed to have breakfast together," James said.

"I know," Danae said rather exasperatedly. "You needn't tell me ten times."

James looked around for his best friends, Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew, who happened to be walking towards them. For some reason, Peter's face fell when he saw them. Sirius, as he often did, looked mischievous. It didn't take too long for James to see the reason why: Peter had a very strange disguise indeed.

"Er, Peter..." James said, frowning. "Why are you dressed up as... what is it, a beaver?"

Sirius burst out in uncontrolled sniggers. Remus, Danae and James were too stunned to laugh. Peter's face turned a deep shade of red and he looked at Sirius, his eyes accusatory.

"You told me it was a special April Fools' Day and that everyone would dress up as an animal!" Peter said desperately.

Sirius was still laughing, but he was now joined by Danae. James and Remus struggled not to imitate her, but the corners of their mouths were twitching.

"It was a joke, Pete!" Sirius said merrily. "A _joke_! That's what April Fools' Day is about. I didn't think you'd actually believe me anyway!"

Many people passed them by and laughed their heads off as they pointed at Peter. The poor boy had never been so embarrassed in his life, and, having lived with Sirius for over six years, that was saying something.

"Come on, Peter, go and change now," James said, his tone bossy, still struggling not to laugh. "You'll meet us in the Great Hall."

Peter ran away. James and Remus watched him leave with a certain pity. Shrugging, James then held out his hand; Danae took it and the four of them entered the Great Hall. Sirius, who looked, as usual, astonishingly handsome, did not even look at the many girls who cast him a hopeful smile. He was unusually silent and was barely listening to the poor attempt at a light conversation James and Danae were displaying for all the students to hear. James had an arm around Danae's waist and was widely using of the Potter Charm.

"What do you think about meeting my parents? I'm going home for the Easter holidays, you could go with me," James said as they passed a group of Hufflepuff girls.

He had said it loud enough for the nearby students to hear, but not loud enough to make it suspicious. He knew that Hufflepuff girls liked gossiping.

"I'd love that," Danae said with a smile.

James smiled back, and as the five of them sat down at the Gryffindor table, James planted a kiss on Danae's lips. People started whispering not so loudly. James Potter had a girlfriend? James I'm-obsessed-with-Lily-Evans Potter? This had not happened for over a year. Girls could allow themselves to hope again!

Sirius tried not to roll his eyes as it was so obvious to him that James and Danae were only acting. He met a brunette's eye across the table. She looked quizzical, but stared resolutely at her plate when Sirius raised an eyebrow at her.

"Isn't it too early for flirting?" Remus asked.

Sirius turned his head to him and met his smiling amber eyes. Sirius shook his head rather haughtily.

"It's _never_ too early for flirting," Sirius retorted with the hint of a smirk. "But I wasn't flirting, not with Vance."

"Yes, evidently she is much too ugly for that," Remus rolled his eyes.

Sirius merely grunted and began eating rapidly and abundantly, as he always did. He was vaguely aware of the fact that James was still talking with Danae about meeting his parents, and that Peter and Remus had started a conversation about the classes they would have that day and what on earth they were going to tell Slughorn to account for not having done the essay, but he wasn't really listening. He was wondering why he had felt butterflies in his stomach when he had looked at the girl, and why he had not realized before that they had been here for a while. It wasn't surprising, after all, he thought, trying to see reason. She _was_ the most beautiful girl in their year, and maybe in the whole school.

He looked at her again. Venusta Vance was sitting with her friends Lily Evans, Mary Watts, and Marlene McKinnon, who was Danae's older sister. Venus had long dark hair which could probably compete with Sirius's in terms of softness and shine. Her cat-like eyes were large, with long eyelashes, of a green bordering on yellow. Sirius's eyes travelled across her face to her full and inviting mouth. He felt his pulse quicken as he suddenly wondered what it would be like to kiss her.

"I was wondering why you were so quiet this morning, but now I've got the answer," Remus whispered, leaning confidentially towards him.

Sirius startled; Remus was smiling kindly at him with just a hint of tease in his eyes. Obviously, he had followed Sirius's gaze and seen that he was staring at Venus. Sirius had just decided that he seemed to fancy her. Problem was, they despised each other.

"Hmmph," was Sirius's only answer, when Remus's gaze became persistent.

"_Hmmph_?" Remus repeated, sounding a little indignant but looking very much amused. "Am I supposed to take hmmph for an answer?"

Sirius shook himself out of his reverie and gave him his usual bright, charming smile.

"Yes, you are."

Remus just smiled, a little too knowingly to Sirius's taste.

"I was only checking if Evans looked jealous," Sirius said, feeling the need to justify himself.

"Sure," Remus gave a condescending smirk.

"I hate it when you do that!" Sirius said moodily. "Why do you always have to know _everything_ about _everyone_, things that they don't even know?"

"I'm sure you know it, otherwise you wouldn't be so cross," Remus replied wittily.

Sirius scowled and muttered something like "damn know-it-all werewolf,". But next minute he was laughing at Remus's joke.

Meanwhile, Lily Evans was giving deathly glares to her bowl of cereal. Her best friend Mary Watts was looking at her in concern. Being extremely soft-tempered, she rarely understood it why Lily and Venus were cross.

"What's wrong, Lily?" Mary asked softly.

Lily turned and peered into Mary's friendly brown eyes. She forced a smile.

"Nothing," Lily lied.

"And I presume that this nothing has Potter for a last name?" Venus said maliciously.

Lily glared at her. Venus was sipping her coffee, her eyes teasing. She was clearly more observant than Marlene and Mary. Lily turned to Marlene, but the blonde girl shrugged.

"I had no idea my sister was dating him," Marlene said.

Looking superiorly disinterested, Marlene turned back to her toasts. Lily sighed; of course, Marlene wouldn't be interested. She was the bookworm of the group. With her heavy-rimmed glasses and pointed noise, she was definitely much more plain than her sister. Danae, Lily had to admit, was alright.

"I don't see what has taken into Potter," Lily thought aloud.

Venus raised her eyebrows prettily. "Ah, so it's Potter again?"

Ever since they had been made Heads, Lily had been calling him James and they had got on better.

Lily shrugged. "Look at him, he's asking for it."

Venus did as she was told, but she really couldn't understand Lily. Being a Chaser in the Gryffindor team, she shared with James an obsession with Quidditch, and had more or less always been friends with him. Venus couldn't help but glanced briefly at Sirius. But, as if on cue, Sirius looked up from his plate and met her eye. Venus immediately looked away.

* * *

"I think it's going quite well, what do you think?" James whispered as they finished eating. 

"She's dead jealous alright," Sirius replied.

James kept on staring expectantly. He barely noticed that Peter had just joined them.

"I'm waiting to hear Remus's mind about it," James explained. "No offence, but I think he understands feminine psychology better than you do, Padfoot."

Sirius childishly stuck out his tongue at him; James rolled his eyes and laughed.

"You won't believe it, but I actually agree with Sirius," Remus said, smiling slightly.

"_Ha_!" Sirius said. "What day are we… April 1st? I must write it somewhere for the record: Moony agrees with me."

They all laughed.

"I think Danae was a good choice," James said after a while, talking as the girl in question wasn't sitting next to him.

James had had in mind the idea of dating a girl just to see if Lily was jealous for a few weeks, and had decided that it could be a little joke for April Fools' Day. The girl had to be neither one of his exes, nor preferably one of Sirius's, and had to like them without fancying them, which was quite hard to find. He had finally settled for Danae McKinnon, a Gryffindor fifth year who had told him she had a crush on Gideon Prewett, so that James's pretending game wouldn't hurt her.

"Definitely," Sirius said. "Everyone seems to believe it."

Peter, who had been glancing around the Great Hall, suddenly burst out laughing.

"What's it, Wormtail?" James asked, realizing that other students had started laughing as well, seemingly without reason.

His mouth hanging open in disbelief, Peter pointed to the teacher's table. Dumbledore had just arrived, a slight smile playing on his lips, his blue eyes twinkling even more than usual. A beard-less Dumbledore.

"What – the – _hell_?" James said in between sniggers.

He turned to Sirius, raising his eyebrows.

"Padfoot?" James asked, smiling widely.

Sirius smiled back and nodded. Who else could have done it? Sirius had always wondered what Dumbledore would look like without his beard; a little research in the library was all he needed to perform the spell.

"A prank on the Headmaster," Sirius said proudly, not sounding the slightest bit worried. "I'm so dead."


	3. Chapter 2: Unusual Displays Of Affection

**Chapter 2: Unusual Displays Of Affection**

"Mr Black, may I have a word?"

Sirius turned reluctantly at the sound of McGonagall's voice. He had been leaving the classroom with James, Peter and Remus when she had called him. Sirius walked casually towards her desk with a feeling of déjà vu, which wasn't surprising given the number of times she had lectured him.

"What is it, Professor?" Sirius asked carelessly.

McGonagall looked at him sternly.

"You are aware, I presume, of the prank pulled on Professor Dumbledore this very morning," McGonagall said.

Sirius struggled to hide a smile and nodded.

"Professor Dumbledore would like to see you to question you on this matter."

Sirius frowned.

"Wait," Sirius said, "what do I have to do with this?"

McGonagall crossed her arms around her chest and glared at him, but the effect was long lost on Sirius.

"Do not take me for a fool," McGonagall said, surprisingly softly. "Don't you think I have heard Pettigrew asking you again and again how you did it?"

Sirius cursed Peter under his breath. He had told James right away which spell he had used and Remus had made as if he wasn't interested. But Peter... well, Peter had pestered him so much that Sirius had become weary and decided not to tell him, just to annoy him. Peter, who had apparently forgiven him for the beaver incident, had not been so discreet during the Transfiguration class. Sirius wasn't lucky; it was the last class of the day, and he might have got away with it had it not been for McGonagall.

"Follow me to Professor Dumbledore's study," McGonagall said when Sirius still said nothing.

Sirius nodded and followed her in grumpy silence. When they arrived there, Sirius decided he had better admit it was him, since they already knew. Dumbledore shook his head, but Sirius could swear there was the faintest hint of a smile on his lips. McGonagall then gave him twenty-eight hours of detention, two hours a day for two weeks, for daring to pull a prank on the Headmaster. Dumbledore then watched in silence as McGonagall lectured Sirius, occasionally nodding. McGonagall, knowing that Sirius was used to detentions, gave him five books about Transfiguration to read before the end of the month, and said that she would ask him questions about them. Sirius felt Dumbledore wasn't angry at all about it, and Sirius even smiled slightly at him before leaving. Sirius then made his way towards the Gryffindor common room. He supposed Remus was in the library, but he could tell Peter about his trip to Dumbledore's office. However, when Sirius entered the common room, any rational thought was erased from his mind: the room was empty except for Peter and a group of second years who were all doing their homework, and Venusta Vance and Fabian Prewett, who happened to be kissing by the window.

The books that Sirius had been carrying fell on the floor with a loud thump. Venus and Fabian broke their embrace and looked at him, but Sirius was in no state to try and read their expressions. He felt an intense urge to vomit. And if he could, to vomit right on Fabian's face.

"Oh, hello, Sirius," Fabian said uneasily.

Fabian was tall, pale and ginger-haired. But right now, his freckled face was slightly pink. Fabian was his fellow seventh year Gryffindor; he was, like Sirius, in the Quidditch team! How _could _he do this? Sirius still couldn't move. He suddenly heard a most unexpected sound: a cat meowing. Looking down, he saw Venus's black cat, Shadow, peering up at him. For some reason, Shadow had always liked him very much.

"Shadow... stupid name for a cat," Sirius muttered, although he had used this line many times before.

Without another look at the couple because he felt that he could not see them again, Sirius walked away, trying to erase the image of Venus and Fabian kissing from his mind.

"I haven't seen anything !" Sirius ran around randomly, shouting and covering his eyes with his hands. "I haven't seen _anything_!"

Sirius passed Lily and James, who were back from helping a group of first years with their homework. Lily watched in interest as Sirius kept on behaving like a dangerously mad man, not looking too concerned about his sanity, or rather, lack of. After all, it was a good distraction from the jealous thoughts that had filled her mind all day.

"Sorry to say this, James, but I really think your best friend is -"

"Mentally deranged," James finished for her. "I know, but he's a good bloke, I swear. What _have_ you seen to put you in such a state, though, Padfoot?"

Sirius suddenly stopped running around them and his eyes widened even more.

"_Nothing_!" Sirius shook his head frantically. "Absolutely nothing! I didn't see anybody snogging, I _didn't_!"

"That's er… good, I suppose," James said.

James wondered what he was supposed to say to make Sirius calm down.

"Have you seen Venus?" James asked. "I need to tell her about -"

"_No!_" Sirius almost wailed. "I definitely have _not_ seen her!"

"Alright, Padfoot, no need to scream," James said, patting him on the back. "Where's Fabian then? I need to tell him too about the new Chasers' tactics."

James didn't think he could make it worse, but he was proved wrong. Sirius winced impressively and his face turned a worrying kind of purple. He began shouting incoherent things. James noticed with a twinge of disappointment that Lily had walked away. But it looked like his best friend really needed him, therefore he didn't try to follow her.

"I have _not_ seen him doing… things," Sirius said, making wild gestures with his arms.

James raised his eyebrows. "I see. Why don't you take a plunge in the lake to calm down?"

Sirius scowled at him. "Okay. But do I get to slap Prewett first?"

"Go to the lake," James shook his head. "Want me to come with you?"

Sirius's face lit up a little. "Alright, but don't ask me about what I _haven't_ seen."

James tried not to laugh because Sirius looked really angry, and they made their way towards the lake. Fortunately, the evening wasn't too cold. They reached the lake just as the sun set. James sat down and watched it, but frowned as Sirius began to take off his clothes.

"Hey, mate! What are you doing?" James asked, sounding a little panicked.

Sirius glared at him as he took off his shirt. He was now wearing only his trousers.

"I was serious when I said I'd take a plunge in the lake."

James goggled at him and shook his head.

"Padfoot, this is not a good idea -"

"I don't ask you if this is a fucking good idea!" Sirius retorted furiously.

Before James could say anything else, Sirius dived in the cold water.

"Sirius Black, Lily was right, you are mental," James muttered.

Sirius's heademergedfrom the water a few seconds later. He looked aghast.

"Prongs!" Sirius called, shaking with cold. "You'll never believe me -"

"Get over here, you moron!" James shouted. "Or you'll catch something worse than a cold!"

Rolling his eyes but shivering nevertheless, Sirius swam back to the shore and got up.

"Now, now, this isn't serious," said a gentle, amused voice.

James and Sirius turned and were relieved to see Remus walking towards them.

"I was in the library and saw you on the Map," Remus explained. "I wondered what you could possibly do out there at this hour. _Siccare_."

With a flick of Remus's wand, Sirius was completely dry.

"Thanks, Moony," Sirius said gratefully.

"What were you going to tell me, that I wouldn't believe?" James asked as the three of them sat down to watch the sun set over the lake.

While Remus marvelled over the beautiful sight, Sirius turned to James.

"The giant squid," Sirius said.

James raised his eyebrows, having not expected this. Sirius was definitely full of surprises that day.

"The giant squid hugged me," Sirius said, in such a low voice that James and Remus barely heard him.

"It _what_?" Remus blinked.

James burst out laughing. He fell on his back and had trouble breathing as he imagined the giant squid hugging Sirius.

"That's – that's _disgusting_, Padfoot," Remus said, wincing.

But Remus was laughing as well, and Sirius soon joined his friends.

"It's probably craving for some affection," Sirius said earnestly once he had regained his composure. "I expect it hasn't seen anyone since last June."

"Or maybe it felt _you_ were in in need of affection!" James suggested.

James was still in a state of hilarity. Remus and Sirius shared a look, and, although Remus's eyes were still smiling, Sirius's face had fallen as he remembered what had brought him there.

"Why did you come here in the first place?" Remus asked in concern.

James stopped laughing quite abruptly and looked enigmatic. His hazel eyes were twinkling as he smirked at Sirius.

"I thought you liked blondes," James said.

Sirius's grey eyes iced, but after a while he gave a small smile.

"You still have tears in your eyes from sniggering, Prongs," Sirius said softly.

James chuckled quietly.

"Not my fault you got hugged by a _squid_, Padfoot! But you haven't answered my question," James said.

"It wasn't a question, actually," Remus said.

"Thank you, Mr Grammar," James rolled his eyes.

They shared a smile, but then Sirius's grin faded as he remembered James's words.

"How do you know?" Sirius whispered.

"It's rather obvious, Padfoot."

James glanced at Remus, who tilted his head to the side.

"Just to make sure, we are talking about the girl who is the definition of charm, elegance and beauty?" Remus asked.

Sirius sent him a glare cold enough to ice the sun. Remus swallowed hard.

"We're not talking about Lily," James said, confused.

"The word venusta means charm, elegance and beauty in Latin," Remus said wearily. "That's why I said that. After years of knowing her, you never wondered what her name meant?"

Remus met two blank stares.

"Never mind," Remus rolled his eyes. "Anyway, Sirius, you've realized at last, then?"

Sirius frowned. He would never have guessed that his friends knew that he fancied Venus.

"What do you mean, at last?" Sirius asked. "How long have you known?"

"About a year," Remus answered casually.

"A _year_?" Sirius echoed, bewildered.

Sirius turned to James hopefully, but James shrugged.

"Same here," James grinned sheepishly.

Sirius took his hands in his head and groaned.

"But why didn't you _tell_ me?" Sirius complained.

Remus and James shared an amused glance.

"How could we?" James said. "Good morning, Padfoot! By the way, I don't know if you're noticed, but you're completely infatuated with Venus."

Sirius sighed. Now that he thought about it, it had been a long time since he had seen someone kissing Venus. Screwing up his eyes, he tried to remember... the last time must have been in sixth year. He knew that Venus and Fabian had dated for a little while in sixth year, but Venus had broken up with him. Still, public displays of affection were unusual for Venus.

"How is it possible?" Sirius said dramatically. "How can I fancy her while she is driving me _insane_?"

"Don't blame it on Venus," Remus said seriously. "I believe you were insane much before that."

James laughed and Remus patted Sirius on the back reassuringly, with a smile that Sirius hated.

"She hates me," Sirius said gloomily, throwing a stone into the water dejectedly.

"Maybe, maybe not," Remus said, and if Sirius had hated his smile, then his words were beyond abhorrence.

"Oh, what am I to do?" Sirius cried.

Remus made to answer him with his usual dose of sarcasm, but James shook his head.

"You know he likes to have his dramatic moments," James muttered.

"Hey! I heard that," Sirius said, his voice hovering between indignation and amusement.

James smiled apologetically.

"Will you at last tell me what you've seen that made you plunge into the lake in the first place?" James asked impatiently.

Sirius gave a great sigh and looked away.

"Fabian. Fabian was kissing her."

There was a long silence.

"You see," Sirius said darkly, "you've got nothing to say now. She despises me, and she's probably with Prewett anyway."

"We don't know the whole story," Remus said cautiously.

Sirius laughed derisively. "I saw enough."

"Do you want me to talk to Venus about it?" James asked quietly.

Sirius shook his head. "No. Just forget what I said, alright?"

Sirius walked away without another word. Remus and James watched him leave, not to worried.

"Our Sirius is in love," Remus said affectionately.

James smiled. "Well, it had to happen some day."

Remus nodded. "She is in denial."

James chuckled as they followed Sirius.

"Those two are made for each other," James said.

* * *

Venus thought her heart stopped beating when she saw Sirius, James and Remus enter the common room. Fabian and his twin brother Gideon were looking out the window, talking in low voices. Venus sat in silence. 

"Quidditch training in ten minutes' time," James reminded them.

Gideon turned to nod at him, but Fabian didn't. Sirius and James went up to their dormitories to fetch their Quidditch things, soon followed by Gideon and a reluctant Fabian.

"What's going on?" Remus asked mildly as he sat down next to Peter.

Peter looked up from the Herbology essay that he was finishing. Venus quickly went up to her dormitories.

"I have no idea," Peter shook his head. "Do you think you could read it and tell me what you think?"

Remus nodded good-naturedly and read Peter's essay, which was not too bad. He could tell Peter had put a lot of effort into it.

"That's quite good, Wormtail," Remus said kindly as he handed him back the essay.

Peter beamed. "Thank you, Moony."

The boys and Venus were back in the common room, holding their brooms and Quidditch robes.

"I'm coming with you," Peter announced.

The others didn't look surprised; they all knew that Peter worshipped James and Sirius, and their talent at Quidditch was something he particularly admired. He had often attended to their trainings. James looked expectantly at Remus.

"I've still got homework to catch up on," Remus shook his head.

Sirius smiled, shaking his head. "Moony..."

They started to make their way towards the Quidditch pitch. On the way there, their Seeker Benjy Fenwick and their Keeper Frank Longbottom joined them. James, the Captain, talked animatedly, especially of the new Chasers' tactics of which he was so proud. Venus was trying to listen to him, but she couldn't help but noticed the deathly glares Fabian and Sirius exchanged. Once they arrived on the pitch, though, she had another problem to deal with: the pitch, which was muddy from the rain of the day before, was already occupied by the Slytherins.

"What are you doing here?" James asked coldly. "We've booked the pitch ages ago."

A dark-haired boy emerged from the sneering group of Slytherins, and Sirius was surprised to recognize his brother, Regulus.

"I'm the new Seeker," Regulus said proudly, "and since it was unexpected, Professor Slughorn went to McGonagall and she agreed to let us the pitch."

"And when are _we_ going to train?" James asked.

The Slytherins snickered.

"Who cares about that?" said the big Slytherins' Captain.

And then, everything happened very quickly. James threw some mud at the Slytherins' Captain; he retaliated, and soon everyone was fighting with mud and shouting insults at each other. Sirius even took profit of the situation to throw some mud at Fabian, too. Fortunately, no one noticed who it was from. Peter had been unintentionally dragged into the fight, and found himself covered in mud. Venus was hitting Regulus's head with her broomstick. Sirius shouted an insult, and a tall, broad Slytherin ran towards Peter, whom he thought had insulted him.

"It wasn't me!" Peter shrieked. "It was -"

But the Slytherin didn't listen to Peter, and kicked his crotch. Peter howled in pain.

"Who said _that_ was allowed?" James roared, livid.

Within seconds he was by Peter's side. The fight immediately stopped.

"Are you okay, Pete?" James asked, looking at his friend in concern.

Peter was still squeaking in pain, though he looked grateful for the attention.

"I'll be fine," Peter managed to mutter.

James scowled at the Slytherins. "You'll hear about that."

Shaking his head, James turned away. His fellow Gryffindors, all covered in mud, followed him after having thrown a last disgusted glance at the Slytherins.

"That was a low blow," Frank Longbottom commented.

"Yes, the Slytherins have reached an all-time low," Sirius agreed darkly. "They made my day."

For the first times in several minutes, James's face lit up and he smiled. "This coming from someone who got hugged by the Giant Squid..."

Six astonished faces stared blankly at Sirius.

"_Hugged_?"

"By the Giant Squid?"

"Sweet Merlin!"

After a few seconds of shocked silence, the Gryffindors' laughs echoed in the dark.

"Thanks, James, just what I needed," Sirius said sarcastically, but he was smiling slightly.

James clapped him on the back merrily, his hazel eyes twinkling, as they entered the castle. "You're welcome. That's what friends are for."

* * *

**¤ author's note ¤** Thanks for the reviews! I know there wasn't much of Lily in this chapter, but of course she will be much more present in further chapters. So far I've done: 3) Someone must get hugged by the giant squid, 4) At least one of Lily's friends has to be involved, 6) One of the Slytherins has to get hit in the head with a broomstick, 8) Peter has to get hit in his 'sensitive areas', 13) Someone must dress up as a beaver, 14) Dumbledore must lose his beard. I'll try to update soon.

**Coming soon:** **_a potion must spill everywhere, with an odd effect on someone. Sirius looked at James, his eyes abnormally wide in worry. "One by one, the penguins steal my sanity."_**

Now you know what to do... _submit review_ :D


	4. Chapter 3: Of Evil Penguins & Electrical

**¤ author's note ¤** Please leave a review! Thanks if you did. Just so you know, the great 'one by one, the penguins steal my sanity' line is Cuban Sombrero Gal's, it's part of the challenge.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Of Evil Penguins and Electrical Bananas**

Three days passed by. Three days which were necessary for Lily to see beyond her jealousy and to realize that, since April Fools' Day, she had not really seen James and Danae together. On Thursday morning, she decided to ask James about it. She didn't want him to know that she was jealous, and even that she was interested, but this was just too weird. It seemed that Danae wasn't James's girlfriend after all, and Lily wanted to know the reason why.

"Er, James?"

James had been walking out of the Heads' rooms. He turned and raised an eyebrow at her. Lily shifted from foot to foot but forced herself to look at him. She wondered why the hell she had arms and what she was supposed to do with them. She decided to cross them over her chest and took a deep breath, as if she had been offended by something James had just done.

"I was just wondering... are you dating Danae or not?" Lily asked, trying to achieve a business-like tone. "Because nobody's seen you two together since Monday."

James leant against the open door and gave his famous lopsided grin. Lily expectedly blushed. She suddenly realized it wasn't the first time that James made her blush.

"Are you interested, Lily?" James asked.

Lily tried but failed not to blush even more.

"I guess I am, if I'm asking," Lily huffed.

James was now smiling broadly.

"And _why_ are you interested?"

She should have seen that one coming. Her cheeks were red again, and she really didn't know what to say. She wasn't going to tell him she was interested because she fancied him.

"You haven't answered my question," Lily said after an uncomfortable silence. "Are you dating her or not?"

James was still annoyingly smiling. "You haven't answered my question either."

Lily sighed. "I asked it before you did. Basic chronological order."

James chuckled. "You swallowed a Remus at dinner last night or what?"

In spite of herself, Lily cackled, but quickly regained her composure and glared at James.

"Danae and I aren't dating," James finally said.

Lily raised her eyebrows in surprise, trying to ignore the immense relief and joy James's words had brought.

"I don't understand," Lily said.

It was James's turn to be uncomfortable. He looked down and bit his bottom lip. Lily knew that look. It meant that James thought he was going to yell at her. And he was nearly always right about that.

"It was a joke," James said, in such a low voice that Lily thought she had misheard.

The words rang in Lily's head, repeated by dozens of little James Potters, bouncing merrily and laughing at her. Lily shook her head. This tiny James Potters thing was definitely worrying, especially as she had been seeing them quite often as of late.

"A joke?" Lily repeated, the disbelief clear in her voice.

"Yeah, you know," James said, still not looking at her, "for April Fools' Day."

Lily's green eyes hardened.

"And who did you think would find it funny?" Lily asked coldly.

James took a deep breath and finally looked at her. Lily was surprised to see the embarrassment gone from his face.

"I hate lying to you, Lily, so I'm going to tell you the truth. I only wanted to see if it would make _someone_ jealous," James said slowly. "And apparently, it worked."

Without another word, James turned and walked away, leaving a flustered and flabbergasted Lily.

* * *

The first class of the Lily's day was Arithmancy, and she was grateful that James didn't take this subject. She was furious that the whole Danae thing was just pretending to see if she was jealous. But the worse was that James knew she was jealous. Lily decided the best attitude from now on would be to ignore James, even if she knew it would be practically impossible, since they were both Heads. She was thinking about it when she entered the Potions classroom, and she took her seat next to Mary without looking at anyone.

"Good morning, everyone," Slughorn said cheerfully. "I'm giving you back your essays about the different uses of oak's roots in Potions. Overall, they are quite good."

"Now, that was a _fascinating_ subject to write about," Sirius muttered, rolling his eyes.

The marked essays magically flew from Slughorn's desk to the tables of the Gryffindor and Slytherin seventh years. Lily smiled contentedly when she saw she had got an O. Venus shrugged at her A, and James gave Sirius a high five, for they had both got an E.

"Today we will be brewing the Bone-repairing Potion," Slughorn announced.

Lily raised her eyebrows in interest, as she planned to become a Healer after leaving Hogwarts. Ten minutes of explanations followed, and then Slughorn began pairing up the pupils. Remus was paired up with Snape, James with another Slytherin, Peter with Marlene, Lily with Venus, and Sirius with Mary.

"Are you ready, Mary?" Sirius asked, smiling slightly. "I'm not all that good at Potions."

Mary giggled. "I'm not too good either."

Mary saw Sirius glance briefly at Venus, who occupied the table at their left, and she couldn't help but felt a little bit jealous. Like a lot of girls, Mary had had a crush on Sirius since fifth year. She knew she had no chance, and she had more or less grown out of it, but the rare times when Sirius talked to her still made her giddy. She felt like a blushing fourteen-year-old in front of him. Venus was a completely different story. Venus was beautiful and graceful; she never looked stupid or embarrassed, or shy. Compared to her, Mary felt plump and ordinary, even ugly. Mary shook her head; she really shouldn't have this kind of thoughts about her friend.

An hour later, the result of Sirius and Mary's association was disastrous. Their potion, which should have been transparent and gently boiling, was orange, and their cauldron was threatening to explode.

"What _have_ you done?" Lily came to their rescue, frowning down at their cauldron.

Mary shrugged and admired the laughing lines on Sirius's face as he smiled helplessly at Lily.

"This is hopeless," Lily shook her head. "I believe Slughorn will be there any minute to interrogate you, after he's done talking with Remus and Severus."

Venus had approached silently behind Sirius's back, and Sirius was so busy stirring the potion that he didn't notice she was standing right behind him.

"How is it going?" Venus whispered teasingly in Sirius's ear.

Sirius jumped in surprise, causing the cauldron to fall over and the potion to spill on the floor. Unfortunately, Sirius's hands were in contact with the potion, and Sirius shouted in pain as it burnt him.

"Aaaaaah! I'm dyiiiiiiing!" Sirius howled, making wild gestures with his arms as though it would make the pain stop.

Everyone stopped talking and looked at Sirius.

"Are you alright?" Mary asked in concern.

"Do I look like I'm bloody alright?" Sirius asked moodily, still wincing in pain.

_Not really._

Venus stood looking at him with a slight smirk, not looking the slightest bit guilty. Sirius squinted his eyes as he wondered how the girl could have the guts to say that.

_Look at him, trying to scowl at me. Oh, but why does he have to be so bloody sexy all the time?_

Sirius's eyes widened. It seemed that Venus had talked without opening her mouth, and that was quite worrying. Yes, _quite_ worrying. But Sirius didn't have the time to register the important fact that Venus thought he was sexy, as Slughorn quickly went to Sirius's side and inquired about the symptoms.

"The potion burnt my hand," Sirius said. "But the goblin said it would be okay."

Slughorn goggled at him.

"What goblin, Mr Black?" Slughorn asked, frowning.

"Well, this goblin," Sirius said impatiently, pointing at an empty space on his right. "I don't see any other one."

_And I don't see any goblin at all. The potion must cause the boy hallucinations._

"What?" Sirius exclaimed, panicked.

Slughorn looked even more worried. "I haven't said anything."

Sirius stared at him, his mouth hanging open in disbelief.

_He must be kidding me._

"I'm not kidding you!" Sirius cried. "And why can't you see the goblin?"

"There is no goblin, Sirius," James said, frowning.

Sirius turned to James. Why wasn't James reassuring him?

_Is he going nuts? Well it had to happen some day. _

"James Potter don't you dare saying that!" Sirius shouted.

Every one was still staring at him in silence, some of them worried, some of them only curious. Sirius didn't understand why he seemed to be the only one who saw the goblin. He suddenly wondered about the penguins. Now that he had a few seconds to think about it, it did seem very strange that a dozen penguins had entered the classroom one minute ago. Penguins. In April. In Hogwarts_. Noooot right_.

"Can't you see the penguins, either?" Sirius asked feebly.

A few Slytherins sniggered. Sirius saw with a twinge of unease that the penguins were imitating their evil snickers. Sirius fancied there was a cruel glint in their eyes. And then, one of the penguins made his way towards him and said: "You are going to sleep."

_Oh, Merlin. The penguins are talking_.

This was Sirius's last thought, before everything went dark.

When Sirius regained consciousness, he was lying on a bed in the Hospital Wing. As soon as he opened his eyes he saw that the penguins had not gone away; in fact, two of them were sitting on his bed, staring at him with their fathomless, scaring black eyes. Sirius had never known penguins could be so frightening.

"Hey, Padfoot," James said softly.

Sirius looked up to see four worried faces. James, Peter, Remus and Lily were standing around his bed.

"Are you still having – hallucinations?" Lily asked haltingly.

James scowled at her.

_Don't try to scowl, James, you only look more handsome._

Lily blushed slightly at her incongruous thought. She was glad that she alone had heard her words. Little did she know that an astonished Sirius had heard them, too.

"You know Slughorn asked me to ask Sirius about the symptoms," Lily said, justifying herself. "He needs to know exactly what Sirius is experiencing so that he can find a cure."

"Where's Slughorn?" Sirius asked.

"In the dungeons, trying to find a cure for you," Remus replied, looking at his friend in concern. "How are you feeling?"

"Well, my hand feels better," Sirius said.

"Are you still seeing the peng -?" Lily started.

"Ssh!" Sirius cut in madly, scowling at her. "Don't – don't mention them!"

_It's too late, he's completely insane. He'll never recover. Better taking him at once to St Mungo's._

"Why not mention them?" Lily asked.

"Because... because I'm afraid of them," Sirius muttered.

As if on cue, the two penguins smirked. Hell, Sirius had never known that penguins could smirk! They started making faces at him. Sirius tried to edge away from them, but he couldn't. Straightening up, he realized with a start that a dozen other penguins had taken over the Hospital Wing, bouncing up and down the beds and singing crazy songs out of tune. Sirius tried not to listen too much to the lyrics. He was not one to be shocked, but the penguins went so far into sauciness that it was just plainly rude.

"Are there any other symptoms?" Lily asked.

Sirius noticed that she was holding a quill and a roll of parchment. He wondered if he should tell her. Being able to hear people's thoughts was fun, but Sirius knew that he had to give Slughorn every bit of information he needed, so that he could find a cure, and soon. The penguins were driving him mad.

"I can... er, it seems that I can hear people's thoughts," Sirius said ruefully.

Lily's eyes widened in bewilderment. It was obvious that she didn't believe him.

_No. He can't be._

"Yes, I can," Sirius muttered wearily.

The penguins were now trying to shove a stick up Sirius's nostrils. Sirius supposed he should be grateful that they didn't go for another part of his body, but _still._ Better not wonder where that stick had been. He tried to push them away, but every time they jumped back on the bed.

"Okay, repeat what I'm thinking, then," Lily said challengingly.

_It has to be something that no one knows... He's just kidding us anyway, he won't hear. Hmm... okay, I don't really hate James Potter, unless hating someone involves wanting to snog that someone senseless._

"You don't want me to repeat that!" Sirius smirked.

Lily frowned. "Go ahead, or I won't believe you."

"I don't really hate James Potter, unless hating -"

"Alright, I believe you!" Lily cut in quickly, blushing furiously.

The penguins were now shouting to Lily that they had told her so. Sirius sighed.

"Can you hear everybody's thoughts?" Lily asked, looking rather embarrassed.

_Don't think, don't think, don't -_

Sirius frowned. "It seems that I can only hear the thoughts of the person I'm looking at. For example, I'm looking at you, Lily, and I only hear what _you_ are thinking. If I turn to James-"

_Why is he looking at me like that? Oh wait, I mustn't think – no, don't look at Lily! I'm such an idiot._

James shook his head. Sirius chuckled.

"Well I've got to get going," Lily said hurriedly. "I'll tell Slughorn about all this, Sirius. Hope you get better soon."

But Sirius barely heard her words, because the two penguins on his bed had started talking to him. They looked more appeased, but Sirius had the feeling that if he didn't agree with them, they would do things that he wouldn't like. After one minute of Sirius listening to the penguins and occasionally nodding to please them, Sirius looked at his friends blankly.

"Electrical banana is gonna be a sudden craze," Sirius announced, repeating the penguins' words, as they had told him to do.

"What?"

"Yes, electrical banana is bound to be the very next phase," Sirius said.

"What the _hell_ is an electrical banana?" James asked.

Sirius shrugged, looking on the verge of tears. It seemed that the penguins wouldn't let him rest. James struggled not to indulge in hilarity despite the situation comedy, because he was extremely concerned with Sirius's mental state, which seemed to be in grave danger.

Sirius looked at James, his eyes abnormally wide in worry. "One by one, the penguins steal my sanity."


	5. Chapter 4: Seven Is A Magical Number

**Chapter 4: Seven Is a Magical Number **

On the next day, when Sirius entered the common room in the evening, back from St Mungo's, many of his fellow Gryffindors eagerly asked him how he was, and it took him about ten minutes to reassure the little crowd and to tell them that he was fine, thanks to Slughorn and several Healers from St Mungo's who had finally found a cure. Sirius was relieved when they all went back to whatever they were doing before he had come in. Being popular was fun, but sometimes it was a bit tiring. Sirius was still exhausted, and all he wanted to do was to join his friends in the dormitories and have a good night's sleep. But it seemed that a black cat also wanted to greet him.

"_You_'ve missed me, haven't you?" Sirius whispered to Shadow.

He was holding the purring cat in his arms, stroking its head. He looked into its yellow-green eyes which reminded him strongly of its owner.

"Shadow," Venus called her cat, standing up from an armchair and walking towards Sirius.

Venus had meant to sound reproving, but the cute sight of Sirius and her cat had definitely softened her voice.

"It loves me, you can't do anything about it," Sirius said, smiling, as he let the cat go.

They both watched as Shadow made its way towards the armchair on which Venus had been sitting, by the fire. Sirius noticed with relief that Fabian was nowhere to be seen.

"So," Venus said uncertainly. "How are you?"

"I didn't know you cared," Sirius said lightly.

"I'm just being polite," Venus lied, shrugging.

Sirius looked around with his eyebrows raised.

"So... how's Fabian?" Sirius asked on a detached tone.

"I didn't know you cared," Venus answered, chuckling.

"I'm just being polite," Sirius sniggered.

Venus shook her head at the idea that she had just laughed with Sirius Black.

"By the way, I've heard that the potion made you able to hear people's thoughts."

Sirius nodded.

"Have you heard anything... interesting?" Venus asked.

Sirius smiled broadly. "Oh, not much. Except that you think I'm sexy."

Venus bit her lip and looked away, blushing slightly. Sirius took advantage of it to eye her up and down, amazed at how hot she looked even in Hogwarts's uniform.

"Good for you, 'cause I'll never say it aloud," Venus muttered.

"Why not?" Sirius asked, walking closer to her, smirking. "It's very easy. Repeat after me: Sirius is sexy. Sirius. Is. Sexy."

"Sirius is stupid."

"I'm afraid you got the last word wrong," Sirius shook his head sadly. "But that's okay, I know what you think anyway."

With a slight smile, Sirius made his way up to his dormitories. Venus watched him leave, half annoyed, half seduced. Sighing, she sat back with Lily, Mary and Marlene, who had watched the scene.

"How long before they jump on each other and have wild sex in a broom cupboard?" Lily asked Mary conversationally.

Mary forced herself to giggle. "Two weeks?"

"Less," Lily replied earnestly. "Venus, why don't you join him in his dormitories already and get it over with? One can only deal with so much sexual tension."

Venus blushed but shook her head firmly.

"That's not going to happen."

"Yeah, _obviously _Sirius is positively repulsing," Mary said, rolling her eyes.

"And _evidently_ he wasn't totally undressing you with his eyes just two minutes ago," Marlene said sarcastically.

"If he's like the other boys that I was unfortunate enough to date, and only wants to get me in his bed, it's not worth it," Venus sighed. "I don't want my heart broken."

"I understand," Lily nodded. "But you never know... maybe he really likes you."

And Lily promised to herself to do something about it.

* * *

One hour later, James and Lily walked together from the common room to the Heads' apartments, talking amicably. Lily realized that they had been doing that a lot, for the past few months. At first, she had had a hard time admitting the fact that James was Head Boy, but as time passed by she realized that he was less arrogant and immature than he used to be. She had to admit to herself that she now found him charming, nice, clever and handsome. Basically what everyone but her had always thought about James Potter.

"Lily, are you listening to me?"

Lily turned to James and grinned sheepishly.

"I'm sorry," Lily said. "I was just thinking."

_About you_, she finished in her head, grateful that this time Sirius wasn't intruding in her thoughts. She hoped Sirius was tactful enough not to tell James about her thoughts. And then, one shouldn't use the words Sirius and tactful in the same sentence.

"You look tired," Lily remarked.

"Yeah..." James nodded, looking down. "You know, I've been worrying so much about Sirius, I know it's stupid, but -"

"Aww..."

Lily impulsively hugged James. Briefly, but it was still a hug. If there was something she found hopelessly cute in James, it was his devotion and loyalty to his friends. She pulled back and smiled at him fondly. James stared back at her in awe.

"Is it a dream?" James whispered. "'Cause I don't remember going to bed -"

"No, it's not," Lily laughed.

James blushed slightly. And then, uncharacteristically, because doing two things highly spontaneous in one minute was something Lily had never experienced, Lily asked James out. Because it was the thing to do, as he looked adorably embarrassed.

"Anyway, er... are you going to Hogsmeade with someone on Saturday?" Lily asked slowly.

James's jaw hung open in disbelief. _Of course I'm not, I've been waiting for this for all my life!_ James thought desperately. He just shook his head.

"Good. Would you like to go with me?"

_Yeeeeeeeeesss!_

"Yes," James said with dignity, as if she had asked him to lend her his bottle of ink, "why not?"

* * *

Two days later came April, 7th, a day that would be forever engraved in James's and Lily's minds. When they woke up and went to the Great Hall to have breakfast, they saw that Sirius was wearing Peter's beaver disguise for a laugh. As Sirius was much taller than Peter, the result was beyond ridiculous. But this is not the reason why this Saturday came to mean so much to our favourite red-head and her Quidditch Captain.

"Hello, everyone!" James said cheerfully to his fellow Marauders as he sat down.

Smiling brightly, he waved at Lily, who had gone to sit down with a bunch of her Hufflepuff friends. Lily shook her head, laughing, and waved back at him.

"Can I vomit?" Sirius asked.

"No," Remus answered earnestly. "At least not until I've finished eating."

Sirius gave a dramatic sigh.

"Padfoot, you look positively ridiculous," James remarked conversationally, as he helped himself to a huge pile of toasts.

"That's the whole point," Sirius scowled.

The four of them ate in silence for one minute, until Sirius exploded.

"You didn't even laugh! You've barely noticed I was dressed up as a _beaver_, for Merlin's sake!"

James shrugged. "Sorry," he said, his mouth full of food.

"Sorry, huh?" Sirius repeated, aggrieved.

Sirius put his hands on his hips in a very Lily-like manner. At the hilarious sight of his beaver best friend imitating Lily, James finally burst out laughing.

"Alright, alright, Padfoot, you're frigging funny," James admitted.

"Ah," Sirius said, satisfied. "But why didn't you say it sooner?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Is it the first thing we have to tell you every morning?"

"It should," Sirius declared.

"Well I had other things on my mind," James said, his eyes twinkling.

"Like what?" Peter asked.

"Like... like Lily asked me out!" James said proudly.

Remus and Peter smiled at him happily.

"Great!" Peter exclaimed.

"Good for you, Prongs," Remus said kindly.

Sirius was sniggering.

"You'd said you were a master at the art of asking girls out," Sirius said. "Doesn't seem Evans think so, if she had to do it herself."

Remus rolled his eyes again. As Sirius's friend, one had to do a fair amount of that.

"You know nothing whatsoever about love," Remus shook his head.

James looked relieved that he didn't agree with Sirius.

"You don't either," Sirius said childishly.

"At least I know that I know nothing, therefore I know something."

Sirius goggled at him. Next to him, Peter squinted his eyes as he tried to understand Remus's words.

"Wow, Moony, that was deep," Sirius said, impressed.

Remus rolled his eyes. Again. He should count.

* * *

There was nothing that James could do to try and make his hair lie flat. Not that he really wanted them to: he loved his hair, and always tried to keep them as messy as he could. It was for Lily. She had always told him, at least before seventh year, that she thought his messing up his hair was stupid. But he couldn't help it: _they would not lie flat._

"What _are_ you doing?" Lily asked, amused.

They were all walking towards Hogsmeade, James and Lily walking on ahead. James reluctantly put his hand away from his hair.

"It just doesn't lie flat," James said apologetically.

"Then why do you keep trying?" Lily frowned.

"'Cause, you know... you don't like my hair when it's too messy," James grumbled.

Lily smiled fondly. "I don't mind... I've got used to it, actually. Now I like it."

"Really?" James said incredulously, grinning broadly.

Lily nodded. As James looked happily lost in thoughts and as Lily had the feeling it would last for a little while, she waited for the others and turned to Remus.

"Can I have a word?" Lily asked him.

"What about?" Sirius asked curiously.

"You're so nosy," Lily rolled her eyes.

As Remus and Lily glared at him, Sirius surrendered and followed James, Peter, Marlene, Mary and Venus. Remus and Lily lingered behind them.

"I've got a mission for you," Lily announced, "concerning Venus and Sirius."

"Why me?" Remus asked, knowing the answer.

"Because all James will care about today is our date, because Mary still fancies Sirius a little bit, because I think Peter wouldn't be subtle enough and because Marlene just doesn't give a damn."

Remus considered it for a moment. He had to agree with Lily.

"Merlin, you've thought this through," Remus said teasingly.

Lily blushed slightly. "Honestly, doesn't it bugger you? I want to get it over with."

"I agree. So what's your plan? Or what's my mission, I should say?"

"You mission if you accept it, is simply to try and Venus and Sirius get on well."

Remus rolled his eyes. "I think you can remove the word 'simply'."

"You've got to bring up the right subjects so that they'll see what they have in common. If they manage to have a good time without arguing too much, that would be a very good start. Oh, and there mustn't be any physical contact between them, because Venus is afraid Sirius might only want to sleep with her and then dump her."

"Now that's a bit simplistic, even for Sirius. In spite of his reputation, he hasn't had that much experience. But anyway, subjects that I will bring up to help them to get along... Quidditch, as they both love it."

Lily nodded. "And pranks."

"Pranks?" Remus repeated, surprised.

"Yeah, Venus has always found most of them very funny," Lily shrugged.

They walked in silence for a moment, thinking.

"And of course... themselves," Lily said at last, laughing.

Remus chuckled. "Of course, how could I forget it? Now, subjects that should be avoided at any price..."

"Their mutual dislike," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Obviously," Remus smirked. "And penguins, too, if we don't want Sirius to freak out."

"And their exes. Touchy subject, especially for Venus."

"I think we've covered it all," Remus said on a business-like tone.

Lily nodded. "That should do. I hope they'll grow out of this habit of arguing constantly."

Remus glanced sideways at her. "And you wouldn't know anyone else who used to have this annoying habit?"

Lily shook her head, grinning. "I really don't see who you are talking about."

* * *

Two hours later, Lily had to admit to herself she had more or less forgotten about Sirius and Venus. But James Potter was her charming excuse for not thinking about her friend.

"After you left the hospital wing, it seems that the penguins asked him to dance, or, rather, _forced_ him to dance."

They were in the Three Broomsticks', drinking Butterbeer, and James was telling her what had happened to Sirius after she had gone in search of Slughorn.

"And Sirius made me conjure up thirty-seven balloons, on the penguins' orders. Apparently they were very specific about the number and the colour of the balloons. It was dreadful," James added.

He was struggling to keep a straight face because Sirius had not found it funny at all, but the corners of his mouth were twitching dangerously and his eyes were already smiling. Lily laughed as she imagined the scene.

"Are you sure he's all right now?" Lily asked, frowning. "Are you sure he's completely sane?"

James stopped fighting with himself and laughed.

"Sirius isn't completely sane," James shook his head. "Never was, and never will be. But I love him all the same."

Lily grinned. "I wonder what the others are doing at the moment..."

* * *

Everything had been quite alright so far, Remus reflected in dismay. Yes, everything had been _quite_ alright _until_ Fabian had entered the Hog's Head. When, after they had been to Honeydukes and Zonko's, the girls had told them that they'd never been to the Hog's Head, Sirius had decided that they should go there. They had drunk Butterbeer and talked about Quidditch, classes, Lily and James, and many trivial things like Venus's Italian origins or why chocolate gateau was the greatest gift ever made to mankind. Sirius and Venus had got along very well, laughing together and teasing each other, _until_ Fabian, Gideon and a bunch of Hufflepuff boys had come in.

"What were you saying?" Remus asked Mary mildly, as they had all stopped talking.

"Er... I was -"

But Mary interrupted her poor attempt at filling the silence, because Fabian was walking towards them.

"Fancy seeing you here, Venus," Fabian said slowly, scowling at Sirius. "Especially in such good company."

"You've got a problem, Prewett?" Sirius snapped.

"Sirius," Venus sighed. "Fabian, please leave us alone."

But the red-haired boy did not move. His blue eyes were flashing with anger.

"And to think that I believed your lies, Venus," Fabian shook his head. "I believed you when you said you had other things on your mind, that you didn't have time for a boyfriend. I was such a fool. Obviously you have changed your mind about Black -"

"You heard her," Sirius cut in firmly. "Just leave us alone."

"You're mistaken if you think she'll care about you," Fabian smirked. "Yes, _quite_ mistaken. Because you think you're the best at everything, but you're just an arrogant jerk with obvious complexes caused by your freaky family -"

Sirius abruptly stood up and punched Fabian in the face, because he had crossed a line by mentioning Sirius's family.

"_Tarentallegra_!" Fabian shouted, pointing his wand at Sirius.

Sirius's legs began dancing uncontrollably. Venus stood up, walked towards Fabian and shook his arm.

"Fab, stop it."

Fabian glanced briefly at her and reluctantly took the spell off Sirius.

"I'm sorry, Fab," Venus whispered. "But please leave now. Nothing good will come out of it."

Fabian scowled one last time at Sirius and left with his friends. Venus turned to Sirius and held out her hand to help him stand up. Sirius gratefully took it, holding it a little longer than necessary.

"I didn't mean -" Sirius started.

"Yes, you did," Venus contradicted him. "But he provoked you."

They sat down again. The others were staring at them in silence.

"So... Fabian and you aren't together," Sirius said slowly after a while.

"Very good guess," Venus huffed.

Just then, James and Lily came in and made their way towards them. They were all relieved to see them.

"Now, not a word to James and Lily about this," Venus whispered hurriedly. "I don't want to spoil their date."

They all nodded in agreement.

"Hey!" James said cheerfully as he and Lily sat down at the large table. "What are you up to?"

"Not much," Sirius shrugged. "Nobody's ex turned up, nobody insulted my family and nobody got into a fight."

Venus nudged him angrily, but James and Lily didn't notice anything as they were both far away, in Happy Couple Land.

"Oh, good," they both said vaguely.

"Sirius," Venus announced, "you deserve a good kick in the bum."

Sirius smirked. "I'm not against it, if you do it."

"I'm sorry, no physical contact," Remus shook his head, smiling.

Remus and Lily looked at each other and laughed.

"Why is everybody so weird this week?" Venus wondered, frowning.

"If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day," Remus quoted.

James smiled. "We've got Sirius to make our days."

* * *

After having had dinner with their respectivefriends, Lily and James went together to the Heads' rooms, and sorted out Heads' business for about an hour. Once they were done, Lily stood up, looked down at James and smiled.

"I've had a great day, James."

James grinned back at her happily. "Me too, Lily."

Lily shifted from foot to foot. James stood up, took a step towards her and leaned forward to kiss her, and it all seemed like a dream to James until their lips touched, because that was the precise moment when Lily Evans became _real_ to him. She let out a soft moan as he ran his hand through her long hair and pulled her closer to him. When they parted, James looked down at her and smiled at the sight of her slightly red cheeks. He felt like saying something stupid, but restrained himself at the last moment.

"Am I supposed to say something clever?" James asked. "'Cause I can't."

Lily laughed quite nervously, making James's own uneasiness more bearable.

"Same here," Lily admitted.

"I'm going to the common room," James said. "What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to write a letter to my parents, have a nice, long bath and then go to bed," Lily answered.

"Sounds nice," James smiled kindly. "Well, have a good night, Lily, and don't wait up for me."

James strangely sounded like a husband talking to his wife. They both ignored this thought, for many different reasons.

"I don't even want to know what mischief you're going to cause tonight, James Potter," Lily shook her head. "But I give you my blessing."

James grinned mischievously at her one last time before she turned to go to her bedroom.

"That's a dangerous thing to say, Miss Evans," James said to her back, his eyes twinkling.

She didn't turn around. He could not see it, but she was smiling carelessly.

"I know, but I don't care. Good night, James."

She entered her bedroom. James stared at the closed door with a rather dumb smile on his face.

"Good night, Lily... I'm going to have some fun."


	6. Chapter 5: The I Snogged Lily Evans Fab

**Chapter 5: The 'I Snogged Lily Evans' Fabulous Party**

James was humming to himself a song of his own invention as he happily made his way towards the Gryffindor common room, a song in which the words 'Lily' and 'lovely' were repeated several times, along with others like 'kiss' and 'pretty'. But then, James had never been much of a songwriter.

"I'm here!" James announced loudly, as soon as he had entered the room.

The common room was crowded, but most of the students stopped talking to look at James, frowning.

"It happened!" James declared, smiling from ear to ear. "Yes, at last, It happened."

Sirius stood up and made his way towards him, his jaw hanging open in disbelief.

"You mean -?" Sirius asked in awe.

"Yeah!" James cut in excitedly. "I kissed Lily!"

There was a general cheer at this piece of news, and James couldn't help but join in, having not been this happy for a long time. However, Sirius looked slightly disappointed.

"I thought you were going to tell me that Snape had an incurable illness or something," Sirius muttered.

James rolled his eyes. "This is much better, mate."

James then stood on a table, facing his fellow Gryffindors with a large grin. With a wave of his wand, he conjured an immense banner on the wall, reading The 'I Snogged Lily Evans' Fabulous Party.

"I declare the 'I Snogged Lily Evans' Fabulous Party... open!"

James conjured up a small firework, and the other students cheered. Someone put some music on, and soon the armchairs and tables lay in a corner, and everyone was dancing and having fun. James made his way towards his fellow Marauders. Remus rolled his eyes at him.

"Do you really think this was needed?" Remus asked.

"Any excuse for a party," Sirius shrugged, smiling.

"If Lily learns about that-" Remus started.

"Oh yeah, I'd forgotten!" James interrupted him, gratefully patting a dismayed Remus on the back. "Thanks, mate."

James magnified his voice with a spell.

"I had forgotten to tell you, but, of course, not a word to Lily, okay?"

Less than an hour later, Sirius and Peter were back from Hogsmeade with lots of Butterbeer. Sirius had even got some Firewhiskey by chatting up Madam Rosmerta. But everyone was having fun and no one asked them how they had got the drinks. Except a fussy Venusta Vance.

"Where did you get that?" Venus asked, frowning.

Sirius smiled mysteriously and remained silent.

"The mysterious guy thing doesn't work on me," Venus told him.

Sirius looked disgruntled. "Here, have some of my special tea."

He gestured towards the drinks' table.

"Tea?" Venus repeated, astonished. "Isn't that too much of a grandmother thing for you, Black?"

"Sirius's _special_ tea," James clarified, winking.

"Alright," Venus shrugged.

Smirking, Sirius gave her a cup of tea, which Venus eyed worryingly.

"You scare me," Venus said.

"What? You're afraid of tea?"

"Of you, Sirius, you stupid devil."

"I told you, I'd prefer you called me sexy devil," Sirius smirked.

"Well, I must leave you, lovebirds," James said, "Remus looks like he needs some help with that sixth year girl."

James laughed as his two friends blushed slightly and walked away, trying to avoid getting hit by the dancers. Venus took a sip of Sirius's special tea, and cringed as it almost burnt her.

"Hell, this is strong!" Venus protested, looking at Sirius accusingly. "You could have warned me! What's it, Firewhiskey and tea?"

"Exactly, with a special secret ingredient," Sirius replied smugly.

"Well, I hope it's not pee..."

Sirius made a face. "Who do you take me for?"

It was Venus's turn to smirk. "Sirius Black."

"Should I take it as a compliment?" Sirius frowned, knowing it most likely wasn't a compliment.

Venus smiled mysteriously and turned to leave.

"I warn you, Vance," Sirius said silkily, "the mysterious girl thing _does_ work on me."

Venus took another sip of her tea. It didn't taste so bad, after all, and maybe it would help her to get rid of the butterflies in her stomach.

* * *

On the next day, Venus woke up with the hugest headache she had ever had. She dressed up mechanically and then looked at herself in the mirror, thinking that she had definitely looked better. But when she saw her roommates Mary, Marlene and Jenna Creevy, she realized that she was apparently the only one to have a terrible hangover.

"What happened?" Venus asked by way of greeting.

"You don't remember anything?" Mary asked, looking concerned.

"A few things," Venus replied vaguely. "What about you all? What did you do yesterday?"

"We all went to bed at about eleven o'clock," Marlene answered.

Venus was under the impression that the three girls were looking at her rather reproachfully. She realized how much she missed Lily, and that her friendship with the other girls was nowhere as strong as the one she shared with the Head Girl.

"I don't even remember at what time I went to bed," Venus admitted.

"We thought you might not sleep here," Mary said.

Venus frowned. "Why wouldn't I sleep here?"

Mary blushed. "Well, you know... Sirius."

"What do you mean by that?" Venus asked, biting her lip in nervousness.

Marlene looked at her disbelievingly. "You don't remember?"

Venus thought about it.

"The last thing I really remember is Sirius giving me a third cup of his special tea..."

"Ah," Marlene said.

"But, reassure me... I haven't done anything bad or shameful, have I?"

Marlene, Mary and Jenna looked at each other uneasily, wondering if they should answer.

"I'll take this as a yes," Venus sighed. "I'm never coming out of this dormitory."

Venus went to sleep again and her roommates, who had by this time already had breakfast, went down to the common room. By two in the afternoon, Venus was up and three hours later she was starting to be really bored and extremely hungry. Hoping the Marauders would not be in the common room, she decided to go to the kitchens to fetch some food. She still had a headache and felt as if she had hardly had any sleep. She almost missed the last step when she spotted the Marauders sitting by the fire, playing Exploding Snap.

"Venus darling!" James called. "Good afternoon!"

"Hello," Venus nodded curtly.

She made to quickly walk away, but James called her back.

"It's not very polite of you, what with all the fun we had yesterday," James said. "Don't you want to sit with us for a while?"

Putting on a forced smile, Venus made her way towards them and sat down on the empty armchair next to Peter. Venus scowled at Sirius.

"I resent you for your special tea! How come you got me drunk?"

Sirius shrugged. "You drank it, I didn't force you."

"I think you needed it," James said.

Venus goggled at him.

"It steadied your nerves," James added. "You were happy."

"She wasn't happy, she was drunk," Remus rolled his eyes. "As you all were."

"You were a bit light-headed yourself, Remus, if I remember well," James smirked. "Anyway, Venus, Remus here, as your knight in shining armour, made sure you didn't do anything that you would _really_ regret in the morning."

Venus looked gratefully at Remus. "Thanks."

"Well yesterday you were grateful enough to call him baby and put your hand on his ass as you danced with him," James chuckled.

Both Remus and Venus blushed. Venus cringed in the corner of the room, looking down.

"And you did the same with Sirius," James laughed. "You were dancing to this song that goes, 'I was meant for loving you, baby, you were meant for loving me –"

"Oh, shut up," Sirius and Venus said as one.

"You didn't do anything else," Remus reassured her.

"Great," Venus muttered. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to the kitchens to get some food."

Venus quickly walked out of the common room. Sirius sighed.

"She hates me forever now," Sirius growled. "Did you have to mention that stupid song?"

"Well you looked like you were enjoying yourselves very much," James said, his eyes twinkling.

"We were."

There was a short silence. Remus pulled out a book and James and Peter flicked through the pages of the latest Quidditch magazine. Sirius uneasily cleared his throat.

"I've got something to tell you… you know, last night, _I _had the Map in my pockets -"

"I know _I _should have kept it," Remus interrupted thoughtfully.

"Well it's not here anymore," Sirius confessed, not looking at them. "I don't know where it is."

James looked positively aghast. "You lost the Map?"

"I didn't _lose_ it, really-"

"How do you call it, then?" Remus sneered.

There was a long, meaningful silence. Sirius was still staring at his feet.

"We'll find it," Sirius finally whispered, trying to convince himself more than his friends. "It can't be far from here, right?"

"Logically, you must be right," Remus nodded.

But James was furious. "Sirius Black, it was the last time you got drunk. I'm never allowing that to happen again."

Remus laughed derisively. "Good luck for that."

* * *

"Excuse me."

Remus, Sirius and Peter looked up from their homework to see Venus staring down at them expectantly. It was half past ten in the evening on Sunday, and only the seventh years were still in the common room studying.

"I was wondering if you could explain something to me about Charms, Remus," Venus said. "Usually I ask Marlene, but she's already asleep."

"Sure," Remus replied.

"Thanks," Venus smiled.

She made to sit down, but there wasn't any space between the three boys, on the couch on which they were sitting.

"You can sit down on my lap," Sirius suggested flirtatiously.

Venus glared at him. "And you can kiss McGonagall if you want, but I doubt you'd like it."

"Fine," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Peter, please?"

Peter gritted his teeth a little that of course he had to stand up and not Sirius, but shrugged and went to sit elsewhere without saying anything. Venus sat down at Peter's place, between Sirius and Remus, and found herself much to close to one of them. She feared she might actually lose her self-control and jump on his lap like he had suggested. Ever since that doomed 'I Snogged Lily Evans' Fabulous Party, she felt even more attracted to him. She had not talked to him since the day before.

"Can't you sit further away from me?" Venus asked Sirius.

"No," Sirius smiled.

Venus rolled her eyes. "Don't you have penguins to see?"

Sirius's face suddenly turned white. It would take him a long while before he could think of penguins without shuddering.

"Sorry about that, Venus," Remus said apologetically.

"Doesn't matter," Venus said indifferently. "I'm used to 'that'."

"Hey!" Sirius protested. "'That' is here!"

"Shut up, 'that'," Venus smiled. "Anyway, Remus, I wanted to ask you about this particular spell -"

Sirius lost track of the conversation, since it revolved around silencing charms which he knew all about, and instead stared at Venus's legs quite openly, since the girl had her head turned towards Remus. She was wearing a black skirt and a low-cut dark red Muggle top. Sirius wondered if he had ever seen a more gorgeous girl, even on the covers of Witch Weekly, and decided that he had not. After about five minutes of explanation by Remus, who pointed to different passages from his neatly-written Charms notes, Venus stood up to leave.

"Thank you very much, Remus," Venus smiled kindly. "You're such a sweetheart."

"It's nothing," Remus muttered, blushing slightly.

"I insist."

Venus leant forward to kiss Remus's cheek, lingering a little too long to Sirius's liking. She smirked as she saw that both of the boys were predictably not staring at her eyes.

"Well I'm going to bed," Venus said silkily. "Hmm... I hope it isn't too cold. What do you think, Remus?"

Remus looked uncharacteristically dumb. "Er... no, surely it isn't, not at this time of the year -"

Venus smiled. "Good. Ciao, buena notte."

Remus and Sirius stared as she made her way towards the girls' dormitories.

"What did that mean?" Sirius whispered after a long awed silence.

"It means, "bye, good night" in Italian," Remus answered.

"Oh," Sirius said, disappointed. "I thought it might have been something like -"

"Like 'go up to bed with me, Sirius'?" Remus rolled his eyes. "You're dreaming."

Sirius stuck out his tongue at him.

"Doesn't it sound beautiful, though?" Remus sighed.

Sirius groaned.

"Moony," Sirius said threateningly, still jealous that Remus had been kissed and not him.

"Can I just say 'wow'?" Remus asked.

Sirius sighed. "You may."

Remus nodded. "Wow."


	7. Chapter 6: James The Matchmaker

**Author's Note:** I don't know when I'll be able to update next (and about The Marauders' Notes, I don't know, either) because I have tons of things to do. Anyway, I hope you'll enjoy this chapter, and please review!

To sum things up, so far (including this chapter), I've covered: **1)** Must include their first kiss **2)** Sirius must either get drunk or high on caffeine **3)** Someone must get hugged by the giant squid **4)** At least one of Lily's friends has to be involved **6)** One of the Slytherins has to get hit in the head with a broomstick **8)** Peter has to get hit in his 'sensitive areas' **9)** A potion must spill everywhere, with an odd effect on someone **10)** Someone must say the line 'one by one the penguins steal my sanity' **11)** Lily must do something highly spontaneous **12)** The Marauders map is lost and found **13)** Someone must dress up as a beaver **14)** Dumbledore must lose his beard.

Coming soon, in the next and last chapter:_ **5)** Lily must reveal a massive secret, **7)** Use the following ten words - siren, hypnotism, squirrel, arachnophobia, goggling, camera, choking, scrumptious, contorting, balloons, **15)** There is a game of truth or dare or something similarly embarrassing._

_

* * *

_

**Chapter 6: James the Matchmaker**

It was only on the weekend after the party that Venus, as she put on the Muggle jeans that she often wore on weekends, discovered a large, blank piece of parchment in her jeans' back pocket. Since she had not worn them since the party, she had not noticed it was there. Frowning, Venus wondered how it had got there. But Mary, Marlene and she had planned to meet Lily in the common room to do their homework together, therefore she decided she could write her Herbology essay on the piece of parchment. She had it in her hand as she entered the common room and sat with Lily, who was already studying with Remus. The light-haired boy frowned at the familiar-looking bit of parchment that Venus held in her hand, but he didn't say anything before she made to write on it.

"Wait!" Remus almost shouted.

Venus frowned. "What, Remus?"

"Er..."

Remus was now sure it was the Marauders' Map. He had looked at it so many times that he knew every inch of it. He was now struggling to find an excuse to take it from Venus.

"Where is Shadow?" Remus asked.

Venus put her quill down, still frowning. "I don't know. Why do you ask?"

"I've heard Sirius saying he had pulled a prank on it," Remus lied.

Venus's eyes flashed with anger and she stood up. Remus cursed himself for being such a bad friend, but, after all, it was Sirius who had lost the Map.

"_What_ have you done to my cat and where is it?" Venus shouted at Sirius.

Taking advantage that everyone was looking at Sirius and Venus, Remus put the Map in his pocket without anybody noticing.

"I haven't done anything!" Sirius protested sincerely.

"Overused line," Venus snapped.

Fortunately for Sirius, Venus immediately went in search of her cat and left him alone. Remus walked towards Sirius, cringing. At least, he was thankful that Venus was too worried to ask why he had told on Sirius's supposed prank, something he never did.

"She had the Map," Remus whispered. "She was going to write on it and hand it to Professor Sprout, I had to do something."

Sirius's eyes widened. "You made her mad at me for no reason! How could you?"

"I'm sorry," Remus said sincerely. "But the only thing that really makes her forget everything else is... well, you."

Sirius smiled. "You think so?"

"Yes."

"You really think so?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "James, help me."

But James was staring fondly at Lily and didn't even hear him.

"At least we have the Map," Peter remarked.

"Yes, well _you_'re not the one who is the subject of Venusta Vance's anger," Sirius grumbled.

"You're used to it, aren't you?" Remus said absently as he started on his own Herbology essay.

Two minutes later, a puzzled Venus came back.

"Shadow was on my bed, apparently okay," Venus said.

"I'd told you so," Sirius nodded.

"Lily, where is the piece of parchment I was going to write my essay on?" Venus asked as she sat down and didn't see it.

Lily shrugged. Venus glanced suspiciously at the Marauders, and then back at her friends.

"It's strange," Venus said slowly, intrigued. "I found it this morning in my jeans' back pocket. I didn't even know it was there."

Remus smirked at Sirius.

"I wonder how it got there..."

* * *

One week passed by. James, being in Happy Couple Land, didn't even notice it, but Lily was determined to get Venus and Sirius together because she was persuaded that if Venus had a boyfriend she would be angrier at him than at her friends. One evening, as Sirius and Peter were busy pulling a prank on Snape, Remus, Lily and James were doing their homework in the Heads' cosy living room. Suddenly, Lily looked at Remus, frowning. 

"Our plan didn't really work out, did it? Trying to get them to talk to each other," Lily said.

"What are you talking about?" James asked, confused.

Lily and Remus rolled their eyes as one.

"Well, something ruined it all," Remus said, pursing his lips and looking pointedly at James.

Lily frowned. James smiled innocently, guessing that Remus was alluding to the 'I snogged Lily Evans' Fabulous Party.

"We're talking about getting Sirius and Venus together," Lily said slowly. "I can't see why you're wearing that fake innocent look."

James didn't want to lie, therefore he remained silent.

"We've got to do something else," Lily declared.

"What was your plan?" James asked.

Lily explained it to him, which inexplicably made James laugh.

"No physical contact? Merlin, _what_ where you thinking about? It's Sirius we're talking about here, you know, a _guy_!"

Lily glared at him. "You've just lost every chance of getting a kiss tonight."

James looked disgruntled. "Anyway, they need some action. We've got to make them snog each other senseless, because it's just what they need. At least, as far as Padfoot is concerned."

Lily kept on scowling. She hated it when James looked like he knew The Truth and she didn't.

"How can you do that? You can't force them to kiss."

"Oh yes," James smiled wickedly. "I can."

* * *

On the next day, after classes, James told Sirius and Venus that he wanted to show them the latest Quidditch magazine, which he had conveniently left in the seventh year boys' dormitory in the morning, when he had come to visit his friends. Venus and Sirius followed him rather reluctantly, and James made them sit on Peter's bed, which was the furthest from the door. 

"It's very interesting," James said, gesturing towards the magazine that Venus had just opened.

James began to slowly step towards the door, while still being turned to his friends and talking to them. Before they realized it, James was on the doorstep, grinning mischievously.

"What are you doing?" Sirius asked, frowning. "Weren't you supposed to explain to us the Cannons' new tactic that's in the magazine?"

"Nah, mate, I'm just helping you out," James chuckled. "You're not getting out of here before you've sorted out your… problem."

With that, James stepped out and closed the door behind him with a spell that his friends would not be able to take off, smiling as he heard Venus and Sirius's cries of protest.

* * *

"So…" 

Venus looked up but said nothing. It seemed to her that Sirius was trying to get over his nervousness, something which was very unusual.

"What do you want to talk about?" Sirius asked.

Venus scowled. "I don't want to talk."

Sirius looked surprised, but far from displeased, and smirked.

"I thought we could do a little bit of talking before that," Sirius said.

Venus rolled her eyes, trying not to blush.

"That won't happen," Venus said.

But Sirius kept on smirking. "Nobody can resist me."

Venus looked defiantly into his eyes. "I can."

"That's what you'd like to think," Sirius shook his head.

Venus was furious. Had he been there, she felt like she could have killed James on the spot. What was he thinking, locking them up?

"I'm _so_ going to kill James."

Venus sighed; she had not meant to voice her thoughts. She had to admit that controlling her doings when she was alone with Sirius was close to impossible.

"He's right, though," Sirius said thoughtfully. "Have you actually stopped to think about why exactly you hate me?"

_No_, Venus thought.

"Yes," Venus replied. "You're an arrogant git."

"Oh, and certainly _you_ are the incarnation of modesty."

Venus hated to admit it, but Sirius was right. Modesty wasn't one of her qualities. Sirius smiled at her silence.

"You must allow me to have certain qualities, right?" Sirius said. "Name one."

"I'm not playing this game," Venus replied.

"Why not?" Sirius asked, walking towards her. "We can't get out of here anyway. Come on, Venus."

He had never said her name this way, like he was purring it in her ear on a morning after. She wondered if he was aware of the effect it had on her. Hell, it was Sirius Black, of course he was. Venus looked away and surrendered.

"Alright…" Venus said reluctantly. "Well, I suppose that you're not… you're not unpleasant to look at."

Sirius gave his bark-like laughter. Venus still refused to look at him; she could swear she felt her cheeks colour slightly, and hated herself for it.

"Come on, say it!" Sirius said merrily.

"Say what?" Venus gritted her teeth.

"That you think I'm handsome!"

"You don't need me to tell you that…" Venus said darkly.

She finally looked at him and his smile almost burnt her. She muttered something over her breath.

"Sorry, didn't catch that," Sirius said cheerfully.

"You _are_ handsome."

Sirius's smile changed to something like fondness. _Fondness?_ Venus thought, rather panicked. _I must be mistaken._

"I'm not your kind of girl anyway," Venus blurted out.

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Really? How would you know that?"

"Your kind of girl would be snogging your right now, or mindlessly gaping at you," Venus replied.

Sirius shook his head. "That's the kind of girl I _used_ to date. I'm growing out of it, if you haven't noticed."

Venus frowned and thought about it. She realized it had been several months since she had last seen Sirius with one of his fan girls. Venus's throat was suddenly dry. What was Sirius trying to tell her?

"I know we're always arguing and all that…" Sirius said, looking embarrassed. "But I can't help but feel attracted to you. I mean, no matter how many times you snarl at me or how much you piss me off sometimes, I just… I just can't help it."

Venus took in the information, but decided that the last bit was the only one her brain would allow to admit.

"Are you telling me that you like me against your better judgement?" Venus asked, trying to sound scornful.

In truth, she had often thought that she fancied Sirius against her better judgement, therefore she wasn't angry.

"Sometimes I think that," Sirius admitted. "But then another part of me forgets that we've despised each other for years, and I say to myself that it would be quite nice, you know…. being together."

Venus could feel her heart pounding dangerously. She had never felt like this before; she had never thought that she would make Sirius Black so nervous, either. Slowly, and without knowing quite why, Venus stood up and took a few steps towards him. She looked down at him and thought she wouldn't be surprised if everyone in Hogwarts could feel the sexual tension between the two of them. Venus took a deep breath and watched as Sirius unconsciously tucked a strand of dark hair behind his ear. She plunged into his grey eyes and felt that she would never really come back.

"If you don't let me kiss you right now, I think I'm going to burst," Sirius announced huskily.

Venus gave a brief smile before her mind completely let loose and she literally jumped on Sirius and kissed him eagerly. That was when they completely stopped thinking. Venus pulled back when her body screamed for help because she needed to breathe.

"That was kind of… wild," Sirius finally managed to say, smiling broadly. "Best kiss I've ever had, by far."

Venus sat up and tried to pull herself together. Her brain was still in slow process; all she was able to think was: _I kissed Sirius Black, I kissed Sirius Black…_ with different intonations.

"So, you don't hate me no more, do you?" Sirius said playfully, sitting up as well.

"I don't know," Venus replied on the same tone.

Sirius kissed her and she was far from rejecting him.

"You don't," Sirius stated, smiling.

Venus rolled her eyes. "Alright, I don't. Maybe James was right after all."

She stood up and made her way towards the window, still trying to get a grip on herself. But Sirius made it impossible when he came wrapping his arms around her waist.

"You are so beautiful," Sirius whispered in her ear. "How am I going to be able to ever take my hands off you?"

Venus chuckled and moaned softly as Sirius began kissing her neck.

"Sirius, stop it," Venus said, but it sounded more like a moan of pleasure.

"You don't… really… want me to stop," Sirius said between kisses.

That was when the door of the dormitories burst open. Venus and Sirius jumped as if electrocuted and turned to see a triumphant looking James.

"_Aha_!" James smirked. "I can see you found a way to pass the time."

"You, James Potter," Venus said, pointing at him threateningly, "are going to meet your untimely death."

But James didn't look impressed; he just kept on smirking as Venus stepped towards him. "I thought you were quite content to be with Sirius here."

Venus couldn't help but smirked too. "The sexy bastard."

"I wonder if this will be written on my grave," Sirius said thoughtfully. "Here lies Sirius Black, the sexy bastard."

James sniggered and Venus's mouth twitched dangerously as she suppressed a laugh. She made to hit Sirius but ended up with her hands gently stroking his chest. James cleared his throat.

"Erm, I'm still here," James said.

Sirius and Venus looked at him. James held up his hands.

"Alright, I'm gone."


	8. Chapter 7: In Which Venus & Lily Squeal

**¤ author's note ¤** I'm having trouble writing the Truth Or Dare game (if anyone has ideas, please tell me!) but I had inspiration for some other things and I figured I had much enough for writing two different chapters, so finally there will be 8 chapters.

This chapter is dedicated to **Avindara Nirvene**, thanks for the nice reviews!

* * *

**Chapter 7/ In Which Lily and Venus Squeal, and James Sings, and Sirius Reveals Another Side Of His Personality, and This Title Is Too Long**

"Sirius, what are you doing?"

Venus glared at Sirius, who held up his hands in mock surprise.

"You know what I'm doing," Sirius answered.

Venus rolled her eyes as Sirius resumed taking photos of her with a Muggle camera that most likely belonged to Lily.

"What I mean is why the hell are you taking photos of me studying?"

"Don't worry, I won't sell them," Sirius promised.

Venus stared at him for a while, bewildered, and then laughed. "You are crazy."

Sirius just smiled as Venus turned her attention back to her Potions essay. Lily suddenly looked up from her own homework to frown at Sirius, thinking that he and Venus seemed to act differently since the day before.

"Sirius..." Lily called slowly.

Sirius turned his head from Venus to Lily and the red-haired girl understood as she saw the look in his eyes.

"Oh my god, you are together!" Lily couldn't help but squeal, jumping up from her armchair in excitement.

James chuckled as almost all the people in the common room eyed Lily with bewilderment.

"Lily, you do know you're acting like a twelve-year old, right?" Venus asked, frowning.

But Lily was still smiling from ear to ear.

"You and Sirius!"

Venus was still staring at Lily warily, a little unwilling to admit it in front of the whole common room. "Erm..."

But Sirius smiled serenely and went to stand behind Venus's armchair and put his hands on her shoulders.

"My friends, I inform you that there shall be lots of hearts broken and we do not really apologize for that, because Venus and I are now a couple."

There were a few girly gasps and disgruntled males' faces, but almost everyone applauded and progressively went back to their respective conversations.

"You are so melodramatic," Venus rolled her eyes.

"We made it!" Lily said excitedly to Remus. "We managed to get them together!"

"Are you kidding?" James laughed. "_I_ made them!"

"What is going on here?" Venus and Sirius asked as one.

James, Remus and Lily looked down at their shoes, James being the first one to look up again and risk a glance at Sirius.

"Nothing, mate," James smiled uncertainly, "it's just that we all thought you could do with a little bit of help, and these idiots here -"

"Are you saying _we_ are idiots?" Lily snapped.

"Are you saying _I_ could do with a little bit of help?" Sirius almost shouted. "I, _Sirius Black_?"

Everyone stopped talking again to look at them. Venus sighed, sick and tired of being the object of everyone's attention.

"Come on, let's go," Venus said, taking Sirius by the hand and almost dragging him out of the common room.

"Wait!" James called. "We were supposed to practice the new Quidditch positions."

Sirius stopped walking to face him and smirked.

"Who said Venus and I weren't going to practice _positions_?"

Several boys sniggered, including James who stopped when Lily elbowed him.

"If I were you I'd avoid comments of that kind, if you don't want to catch arachnaphobia," Venus hissed.

Sirius frowned but followed her out of the common room.

"Where are we going?" Sirius asked.

"Outside," Venus shrugged.

"We're not supposed to go outside at this hour," Sirius smiled.

Venus turned to grin back at him, shaking her head.

"You of all people..."

A few minutes later they stepped outside in the beautiful late April night.

"What are we going to do? Stargazing?" Sirius asked hopefully.

Venus turned to him, smiling as she anticipated the crestfallen look on his now arrogant face.

"You know, James was right about the Quidditch positions, we do need to practice them."

Sirius's face expectedly fell.

"Quidditch? At this hour? But we don't even have our brooms!"

Venus raised her wand. "_Accio_ brooms."

Venus smiled contentedly as the two brooms flew towards them.

"You are so cruel to me..." Sirius complained. "Can I at least get a kiss afterwards?"

"Maybe..." Venus smiled maddeningly. "If you're nice. You've got to make up for years of making me mad at you."

Humming to herself, Venus began to fly towards the Quidditch pitch, soon followed by Sirius.

"By the way, what the hell is arachnaphobia?" Sirius asked.

"I have no idea, I just wanted to use a big word to impress you."

Sirius shook his head and looked up at the half moon, out of habit. "You'll be the death of me, woman."

"I shall be, if you ever call me woman again."

* * *

"Moony!" 

"No."

"Please!"

"No."

"Pretty please!"

Remus didn't look up from his book, missing the sight of a most pleading looking Sirius Black with the puppy eyes, and all.

"No."

"_Ugly_ please?"

This time, Remus looked up and smiled slightly, but still shook his head.

Sirius's smile vanished. "Fine," he grumbled.

Remus returned to his book, but Sirius was still there, sitting on Remus's bed and staring at him in a most unnerving manner.

"Padfoot... What are you still doing here?" Remus asked, looking up at him.

Sirius grinned affectionately. "Come on, Moony, pretty please with a Chocolate Frog on top?"

Remus laughed. "Still no."

Sirius rolled his eyes, faking exasperation. "Fine," he repeated.

Remus read another two pages, but Sirius was still there.

"By the way, can I borrow your... erm, poetry book?"

Remus glanced at Sirius, bewildered.

"What does a poetry book have to do with the latest prank that you want to pull on Snape and want me to help you for?" Remus asked, frowning. "Which, for the hundredth time, I won't."

To his great surprise, Sirius blushed slightly.

"Nothing," Sirius replied, looking away. "I just... I just think I might need to look up, ah, things..."

"Care to be more specific?" Remus asked, shutting his book and putting it down.

"Moony, _why _do you have to put your book down precisely when I don't want you to, while you didn't put it down when I wanted you to?" Sirius sighed.

Remus smiled. "Because I'm an evil werewolf."

Sirius finally looked at him and gave a slight smile. "Right you are."

"So? The poetry book?"

Sirius studied Remus's face for a while and then stared intently at the wall. "You already know the answer, don't you?"

Remus chuckled. "I just want to hear you say it."

Sirius ran a hand through his hair nervously and muttered, "It's for Venus, alright?"

"What do you mean exactly?"

Sirius made to smother Remus with his pillow, but they both were laughing. Sirius looked down at Remus and saw the twinkle in his amber eyes.

"You prick," Sirius said softly.

Sirius straightened up and allowed Remus to sit up as well.

"Did _Sirius Black_ just call _me_ a _prick_?" Remus asked in mock awe.

This was probably a first in The Marauders' History. Remus couldn't wait to tell James and Peter.

"Yes, Remus Lupin, you're a sadistic bastard," Sirius nodded.

There was a short silence, during which Sirius played thoughtfully with his hair.

"Do you think she's the kind of girl to like poetry?" Sirius asked quietly.

"Who?" Remus asked innocently.

Sirius once again threw himself on Remus and they started a mock fight which Sirius, as usual, won.

"This was for acting like me," Sirius declared.

"Now you see what it's like to be me," Remus said mildly. "And _I_ don't try to smother you with your pillow."

Sirius rolled his eyes in a good imitation of Remus. "Let's go back to the point, shall we?"

"My voice isn't high-pitched," Remus protested.

Sirius sniggered. "I know, it was just for the fun of it. I probably should grab a book if I want to make the imitation complete, though. And some chocolate. And the air of someone who is meditating spiritual shit."

Sirius half-closed his eyes and earnestly put on what he thought was a Remus-in-meditation expression, only resulting in making Remus burst out laughing.

"You stupid, _stupid_ prat," Remus said, shaking his head.

Sirius jumped on the bed cheerfully. "Okay, back in Sirius Black mode!"

"Oh Merlin," Remus muttered. "This promises to be insane."

He could always resort to talking about penguins. In cases of emergency only, as James and he had decided. Remus looked at Sirius carefully.

"About Venus..." Remus started.

And suddenly Sirius's whole attitude changed and he stood up and began pacing worryingly, contorting his hands.

"She's not the kind of girl to like poems, is she? I knew it," Sirius rambled, without waiting for Remus's answer. "I mean, she's so... so _Venus_, y'know? She's the complete opposite of the average girl. Which is what I like about her, really, but... What can I do? I don't want her to think – to think that I date her only for her looks, no, I really like her. She's clever and sarcastic, just like you, and she's passionate and brave and independent just like me, and she's honest and sporty just like Prongs. And, man, she's _beautiful."_

Remus smiled gently and said, "Sirius."

Sirius stopped pacing, sighed and looked at Remus.

"You're in love," Remus stated.

Sirius's mouth fell open in disbelief. "I'm in... I'm in _love_?"

Remus nodded. "Yes."

"I'm in love?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Yes."

Sirius blinked.

"You mean I'm in love?"

"Yes," Remus clarified.

Sirius was still staring blankly at him.

"I'm in love?"

Remus took a deep breath. Oh the treasures of Remus Lupin's patience...

"Yes, you are in love," Remus said firmly, detaching every word. "And no matter how many times you'll say it and with many different intonations, it still won't change the fact that _you are in love."_

"Oh. I'm in love then."

Sirius fell back on the bed gracefully.

"Oh, really? How did you figure that one out?" Remus asked sarcastically.

"Hey, Moony!" Sirius protested, gripping Remus's shirt quite frantically. "I need your help! Don't go up to your Ivory Tower of Sarcasm!"

Remus decided to ignore the Ivory Tower of Sarcasm thing. There would be plenty of time later to explain to Sirius how good it was to be sarcastic, even though he knew it would be of no use whatsoever.

Remus breathed in and out. "How can I help you?"

"I don't know! You're the one who's supposed to _know_ about things, aren't you? Arg, sometimes you just frustrate me to no end! Oh, what am I to_ dooooo_?"

"Calm down, Sirius."

Remus was thinking about bringing up the penguins, but fortunately the door of the dormitory open. Unfortunately, it was Venus.

" Hello," she said uncertainly, hovering near the doorway.

"Come in, come in," said James, arriving behind her and leading her into the room.

Venus looked around. Sirius cursed himself for not listening to Remus when he had told him to clean up the mess. Remus cursed himself for not having cleaned up the mess himself anyway.

"No more trap, now James," Venus joked. "I don't want to be locked up in here twice in a week."

James smirked. "I don't need to lock you up anymore, do I?"

Venus laughed and glanced at Sirius, who still had not said a word. "I guess not."

James sat down on his old bed with Venus next to him.

"Do you like poetry?" Remus asked her, in a loyal attempt to help Sirius.

"Not really," Venus admitted, surprised. "Why do you ask?"

Remus looked down at the floor, unwilling to answer. Fortunately, James came to his rescue.

"What's wrong, Padfoot? You haven't uttered a single word yet. Are you ill?"

Sirius looked panicked and Remus suppressed a chuckle. Love must be indeed a kind of illness to Sirius Black.

"I'm fine," Sirius said faintly.

"Oh, I know what could make you feel better!" James announced, grinning. "You should sing! You love singing."

Sirius growled. James, oblivious, turned to Venus.

"Have you ever heard Sirius sing 'My Valentine'? He goes like, 'Oh won't you be my Valentine _toniiiiight_?', every morning in the shower."

Sirius buried his face in his hands and started making choking sounds as his best friend mercilessly stabbed his heart.

"And there's also, 'You take my breath away, sweet _siiiiren_ -'"

"I think she's got the picture," Sirius said from behind his hands.

Venus chuckled and went to sit beside him.

"You're cute when you're embarrassed," Venus said quietly.

"Really?" Sirius asked, removing his hands.

"Really," Venus smiled lovingly and kissed him.

James smiled mischievously. "Now all that's missing is one of Sirius's renditions of My Sweet Siren. I know it's his personal favourite. What do you say, Moony? "

Remus had the same smirk. "I agree."

Sirius moaned, "Oh, you're so mean, so _mean_ - _and where the hell is Peter when I need him?_"

"Come on, I'll get you started," James said helpfully. "I don't know what to sayyy, you take my breath awayyy, sweet siiiiiren..."

James's loud and slightly off key singing had covered the sound of the opening door, and Lily now stood in the doorway. She was goggling at James and laughing her head off. James finally spotted her and stopped singing at once.

"Why did you stop?" Lily asked. "It was... it was _good_!"

But she burst out laughing, soon joined by Remus and Venus. Sirius patted James's shoulder in sympathy, glad he had escaped ridicule. Lily walked towards them and hugged James.

"This was very sweet," Lily said.

"Yeah, right," James muttered.

Lily kissed him. "It was. Nice to know James Potter is just a normal human being."

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "It's true that you've never seen his toes."

James scowled at his best friend.

"Why do you say that?" Lily frowned.

"'Cause they're not human toes, really," Sirius said earnestly. "More like a squirrel's -"

"I'm not sure squirrels have toes," Remus cut in thoughtfully.

"I think they do," Sirius said gravely.

Venus smiled. "Then there shall be no more arguing upon the matter."

"Exactly," Sirius agreed. "Now who wants some apple pie? I brought some from the kitchen earlier."

Venus grinned, pleased, as she took a piece of pie.

"It's my favourite flavour," Venus said.

« I know, » Sirius replied quietly.

There was a silence as Venus emitted a squeal that was very much out of character and threw herself into Sirius's arms.

"You're a nice guy after all," Venus whispered.

"Oh, a borderline case," Sirius said, smiling slightly.

"We don't know what to make of him," James shook his head seriously.

Venus pulled back and Sirius found himself missing her. He glanced at Remus, who smiled gently at him. Meanwhile, everybody had helped themselves to some apple pie.

"This is scrumptious, darling, scrum-pti-ous," Venus said, smiling. "Now we can _finally_ say it's worth it to date a Marauder, can't we, Lily?"

Lily nodded earnestly. "There had to be a reason."

James looked at Sirius, "They're joking, right?"

Sirius smiled serenely and nodded. He put on his Remus-in-meditation expression again and stroked his imaginary beard.

"Ah, you know, women..."


	9. Chapter 8: Truth Or Dare

**Sorry it took me ages to update. I don't think this chapter is very good (the Truth or dare game especially sucks), but I was just sick and tired of having this story on my mind, I wanted to finish it. Please review anyway.**

**_This is the last chapter of the story._**

* * *

**Chapter 8: Truth Or Dare**

On the last day of April, when Venus entered the Great Hall for breakfast she went directly to the Marauders' usual place and smiled when Sirius rose from his seat to kiss her. She contentedly ran a hand through his exquisitely silky hair and, when they pulled apart, she tried to ignore the jealous death glares many other girls were giving her, and instead frowned at Remus, James and Peter's flabbergasted expressions.

"What?" Venus asked.

James opened his mouth, looking dumbfounded, and closed it, shaking his head.

"You... you let her touch your _hair_?" Remus asked slowly.

"Well, as a matter of fact, yes..." Sirius replied, looking strangely embarrassed.

Peter looked in awe, too. Venus wondered what the hell was wrong with them this morning. James suddenly smiled widely.

"You know what this means?" James said excitedly to Remus and Peter, who grinned back at him.

"Will anyone tell me what all this madness is about?" Venus demanded, turning to Sirius. "Sirius? What's it with your hair?"

Sirius bit his lip, looking down.

"He never let anybody touch his hair," Peter finally explained, when Sirius remained silent.

"A few girls tried, though. Sirius pulled a prank on them as a punishment, and it wasn't very nice to see," Remus added conversationally.

"By now, you must have realized how he is with his hair!" James finished, rolling his eyes.

Slowly, a smile crept over Venus's face. She was the only one who had the privilege of touching Sirius's wonderfully soft hair? Oh, life was beautiful.

"Did you have to tell her that?" Sirius gritted his teeth.

James smiled. "Padfoot is ashamed? Wow, Venus, I believe you really –"

"Shut _up_," Sirius cut in, growling.

"Alright, alright, don't bite me!"

* * *

"We should do something tonight," Sirius announced a few minutes later, having recovered from his unusual embarrassment, "the whole lot of us." 

Sirius met two pairs of wary eyes (predictably, Lily's and Remus's) and three excited gazes.

"What are you thinking of?" James asked, his eyes twinkling.

Sirius shrugged and smiled. "I've got some Firewhiskey."

"Oh, no," Venus shook her head, "no way. I'm never drinking that again."

"Again?" Lily asked. "When did you last drink Firewhiskey?"

Venus glared pointedly at James, but Sirius came to his rescue.

"I got her drunk," Sirius said.

"That's only half a lie," Venus muttered, rolling her eyes.

"Sirius!" Lily protested. "That's... that's _bad_!"

She rounded on Venus, her hands on her hips as she saw that the dark-haired girl was smirking.

"Don't you agree with me? Aren't you outraged?"

"Oh yeah, I'm outraged," Venus said, laughing.

Lily watched, bewildered, as Venus kissed Sirius.

"Guys, please get a room," James complained.

"We will," Sirius said as they pulled apart.

"Prick," Venus rolled her eyes.

Lily shook her head and looked at Remus for support, but he was smiling too. Lily held up her hands in surrender.

"Okay, let's go for the Firewhiskey."

"Really?" Sirius gasped. "Is this the end of the world?"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Venus, tell your boyfriend he's stupid."

Venus chuckled. "He already knows. It's no use telling him, really -"

Venus trailed off as Fabian walked towards them, his face whiter than ever, his blue eyes expressionless. They watched in astonished silence as Fabian knelt at Sirius's feet and did an odd kind of curtsey.

"Sirius, you are the best and you shall have Venus," Fabian said blankly, his head bowed respectfully. "I don't deserve her, I am an imbecile."

Lily giggled and quickly covered her mouth with her hand when Venus glared at her.

Sirius smiled broadly. "Right you are, Prewett."

Fabian stood up and walked away, revealing an inscription on the back of his robes, reading "Sirius Black rules". Many students pointed at him, giggling.

"Sirius..." Venus glared at him.

Remus, Peter, Lily and James were struggling not to laugh. Sirius looked very satisfied with himself.

"So how about tonight? Anyone for a Truth Or Dare game?" Sirius asked nonchalantly.

Venus kept on glaring.

"What?" Sirius asked innocently. "People prostrate themselves before me every day!"

They all laughed, even Venus.

"Not my fault if people think I'm cool. I can't blame them."

Sirius smirked arrogantly.

"Sirius, didn't you learn your lesson?" Venus asked silkily. "Do you want to play Quidditch in the cold again? Or maybe you'd rather meet some penguins -"

"No!" Sirius almost shouted, his eyes widening in horror. "Not _those_ horrible creatures."

James was laughing with his head in his hands as he couldn't look at Sirius without exploding any time penguins were mentioned. Still, Venus was glaring, her eyebrows raised, at Sirius.

"Fine," Sirius finally grumbled, "I _made_ Fabian do this."

"How?" Remus asked.

He was, in spite of himself, always curious to know how Sirius came up with his pranks. Sirius was, he had to admit, a pranking mastermind.

"It's a kind of ancient hypnotism. Took me one week to master it, but I'm quite proud of the result."

Lily frowned, thinking. "But... isn't that illegal?"

James smiled and patted Lily's head gently. "_Who_ said anything about doing _anything_ illegal, now?"

For a while, green eyes faced hazel, and they all remained silent, waiting.

"Okay," Lily finally said. "Hypnotism must be legal."

Sirius stared at James, impressed. "Wow, mate, you must teach me that eye thing."

"It won't work on me, Sirius," Venus said.

"Why not?"

"Because you don't have James's eyes," Venus simply replied.

"And _what_ do James's eyes have that mine don't have?" Sirius asked, disgruntled.

"Well, you see, James's eyes are very..."

"Persuasive," Lily finished.

"They are," James smiled proudly.

Sirius raised his eyebrows in bewilder and shook his head.

"That's the worst piece of rubbish I've ever heard, isn't it, Moony?"

Sirius turned to his last ally. Or so he thought.

"It's true that James has that glint in his eyes that make you think you'd better be on his side," Remus replied, hiding a smile.

"You're all speaking absolute _rubbish_," Sirius declared. "My eyes are wonderful."

Venus frowned. "We're having one of those pointless arguments again. Let's just let it drop."

"But I don't _understand_!" Sirius whined. "What do James's eyes have that mine don't have? _What_?"

Lily laughed. James smiled and kissed her cheek tenderly. Sirius made a face, muttering "disgusting".

"It was just to get you to talk for the sake of talking and watch as you make a fool of yourself," Lily said, looking like she was enjoying herself very much.

Sirius looked bewildered for a while and then pouted.

"Ah, Evans, I've always known you were evil..."

* * *

"Padfoot? Truth or dare?" 

Sirius's hair fell on his eyes as he turned to James.

"Dare."

Remus rolled his eyes. "What a surprise! Ever since we've played that game, Sirius, you've _always_ chosen dare. It's as though you're hiding some things from us."

Sirius held up his arms in surrender and grumbled, "Fine, truth."

James thought for a while, a mischievous smile slowly forming on his face. Enough to worry Sirius.

"How long have you fancied Miss Venusta Vance?"

Sirius winced. "Prongs, I _thought_ I was your best friend."

"Come on," James said, still grinning. "You wouldn't want to be the first Marauder not to answer a Truth, now, would you?"

"Okay, I'm answering if Moony agrees to do a dare that I will choose."

Remus looked warily at him for a while and finally nodded.

"You don't know what you're in for, Moony!" Sirius laughed. "And about your question, Prongs, how can I answer if I don't know the answer?"

"What do you mean, you don't know the answer?" Venus asked, frowning.

"Well, you know, denial, that sort of things…" Sirius said vaguely. "Why, do _you_ know exactly how long you've fancied me?"

Venus shrugged, smirking. "Who said I fancied you?"

"Trust me, if you did not fancy me, you wouldn't do the things you do, like –"

"Too much information", Lily cut in hastily. "I think you can stop now, Sirius."

Sirius was still smirking. "Forgive me for almost damaging your innocent ears."

Lily stuck out her tongue at him, not quite believe she was acting so childish. "I hate you."

"Yeah, right," Sirius said sarcastically. "Venus hates me, too, you know. Anyway, it's Moony's turn!"

Sirius was glad that everyone seemed to have forgotten that he had not really answered James's question. He considered himself a master at the art of diversion. He opened his mouth to announce Remus's dare, his eyes twinkling.

"No stupid dare," Remus said warily.

Sirius closed his mouth, looking disappointed, and pouted.

"But that's what dares are, Moony! They're stupid."

"Yours certainly are," Remus rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, like other people dare their friends to read a book or something," Sirius sniggered.

"Well, I imagine that would indeed be a dare for you," Remus said with dignity.

Sirius just smiled; he thought for a while and then his face lit up.

"I dare you not to do anything while you watch us eat an outrageous amount of chocolate."

James and Peter laughed at the horrified look on Remus's face.

"That's a good one, Padfoot," James said appreciatively.

"It's not really a dare if you dare him not to do anything, is it?" Lily pointed out.

Remus glanced at her gratefully, but Sirius shook his head.

"_I_ set the rules to that game," Sirius said arrogantly, looking every bit like a spoilt child.

"Fine," Lily gave up. "Sorry, Remus."

Remus sighed, resigned, and watched as Sirius stood up and got out a large box from under his bed. He then distributed the chocolate to his friends.

"I didn't know you kept chocolate under your bed," Remus said, surprised.

"If I want to keep it, better not tell you about it, right?" Sirius laughed. "Especially as it is _delicious_."

Peter, Venus and Lily were simply eating, with a small smile on their faces, but predictably, Sirius and James were making a show out of it. At one point, Sirius made his way towards Remus and ate the chocolate just inches from Remus's face, smiling broadly. Remus struggled to keep an impassive expression. Five minutes and a _lot_ of chocolate later, Sirius clapped Remus's shoulder.

"Well done, mate."

Remus sighed. "I don't even know why I'm playing that stupid game."

"Because now you can get revenge!" Sirius said. "It's Lily's turn."

"I choose truth," Lily said.

"I'm going to be totally unoriginal here, but I'm curious to know, who was your first crush?" Remus asked, smiling.

Lily blushed and goggled at him. "Remus!"

Sirius laughed. "He's not an angel, Lily."

James looked a bit uncomfortable as he eyed Lily warily. "I suppose I was not your first crush."

Sirius and Venus snickered; James glared at them. Lily was still silent and red-faced.

"Well? Lily?" Remus raised his eyebrows. "It can't be that shameful, can it?"

"Okay, I'm going to tell you," Lily sighed. "But I really want to insist on the fact that I was thirteen at the time, and that it's now completely _over_."

"Come on, spill," Sirius said; he couldn't wait to make fun of Lily. "Who was it?"

"Well… it was… you," Lily whispered, looking down.

There was a rather shocked silence. Lily had always wanted to keep her stupid crush a secret, but you can't always get what you want.

"Sirius? Sirius was your first crush?" James asked in disbelief.

"I got over it years ago, don't worry," Lily said. "But, you know, you don't control a crush, do you?"

"I guess not," James admitted. "But, still…"

"Sorry, Prongs," Sirius said, "you know how no girl can resist me."

They all snorted – Sirius glared reproachfully at Peter, who stopped immediately.

"Anyway, as I said, it was in third year," Lily repeated. "Don't go and imagine things, Sirius."

Sirius winked. "Wouldn't dare to, love."

"He's going to be insufferable, now," Remus muttered.

"You asked for it, Remus –" Lily started to protest.

"Is that not how he was before?" Venus smiled.

It all ended with a giant pillow fight which Sirius won (after stealing James's glasses so that he couldn't see anymore). James and Lily went back to the Heads Tower and Peter and Remus got shooed out of their own dormitory by Sirius and Venus.

As Lily and James entered the Heads' living room, she turned to him, frowning.

"Are you angry?"

"No," James replied shortly.

He had been silent all the way there. Lily kissed him and was relieved when he kissed her back.

"It's just a bit weird, that's all," James said. "Don't worry, everything will be alright tomorrow."

Lily nodded. "Okay. Good night, James."

James smiled and kissed her hand in an old-fashioned manner and watched as she made her way towards her bedroom.

"Good night, Lily. Have sweet dreams, though preferably not about Sirius…"


End file.
